Prototypically Uniquely... a Lady

2010-05-18T16:06:00.004-05:00

Ran 6.48 miles yesterday... my longest run to date. I'm still high. I want to run right now. I may go running before football practice. Anywho. I saw these Asics ads that I loved. I wanted to share them with the aspiring runners out there. GET UP AND GET OUT. Don't worry about anyone but yourself. Your pace, your distance, your run. :0) Just do it! :)

What is more beautiful? A salon blow-dry or feeling the wind in your hair? We believe beauty is real effort made by real runners… Because the jacket breathes as hard as you do, is a truly beautiful thing.

What is beauty? Rosy cheeks painted with blush or the glow from a 10K run? We believe that beauty is real effort made by real runners…

Beauty is often found where you least expect. Its not inside a make-up bag, its halfway up a steep hill or in the final 50m of a tough 10K. Beauty is real effort made by real runners…

Hairstory

2010-04-20T12:56:00.006-05:00

So I read a blog on Mane and Chic and totally loved it! Hair is such and important thing to a woman. You can have the cutest outfit on in the world and your hair look a mess and you can't get your swag together. Matter of fact you can end up just looking a mess. I know for me when my hair is a mess or isn't what I want it to be, I have a cloud over my day. No matter how great the day is something is draining me.

My Hairstory

I grew up with extensions in my hair. My hair was always somewhat thin and my aunt just loved spending time learning new styles and trying them out on me. I mean I even remember a picture from when I was about 6 years old with braids. Majority of my school pictures, I had braids. I loved them.

Then came the "Hawaiian Silky" treatment my granny talked me into. Now... I was bamboozled. I wanted hair with the big waves and flowing. Not juicy... just "good hair". Well... it was a Jerhi curl to be real. I remember times when I would be on the bus and lean on the window and leave behind my juice. Totally not pleased. I had that for a few years and then it had to go. (it may not have even been that long). I do believe this came after my first perm... and all I remember about my first perm is that I wore my hair half up half down.

Back to braids and then I started wearing my hair out. It was actually very healthy. I got it done at the shop and it was nice. I think the lack of creativity and the longing to have hair like those with lighter complexions kept me from being pleased. I also wanted my hair to be long. *stomping feet* Long long long.

Then college. I had mom do the longest braids ever. lol. I have to look back on pictures. Long too. I had those for a while, then I remember taking them out and pressing my hair. I had a friend of mine press my hair for me in the dorm. Hair was nice and flowy, I loved it... then... I washed it and had her press it. It wasn't completely dry. The next morning I looked at my hair and I had orangish spikes that were less than an inch long. I DIED. Like... what the heck do you do to your hair. I was upset... I'm sure I cried. Then, like I always do, I rolled on. I went to Oasis salon and had it chopped off. Shaved in the back. I think I nearly died in the chair because I vowed to never get my hair cut that short.

When I had it short I LOOOOOOOVED it. It was easy, but I had to stay in the shop. Gosh I loved it *day dreaming* That was how my hair pretty much stayed. I tried to to grow it out, got frustrated, cut it again. blah blah blah. Some weaves here and there. Man I really loved my short cuts, if only I wasn't in the shop every two weeks spending $80/month...

Ok so I'm going to be honest about how my longing for natural hair started. First I LOVE Locs. I love them so much and I would keep seeing women with them and loving it. I knew that's what I wanted at some point in my life. lol. I even set a time period. Somewhere after I'm married and have my first child. I figure at that point I'll be tired of doing my hair. lol. Anywho. I was getting ready to go out and I hated how my hair held up in the club... because it truly didn't. Not matter what I did, my hair looked a hot mess. So while I was walking through downtown Decatur, GA I saw a wig and I loved it! And thus it began.

(NYE 2007)

I would wear wigs all the time. I stayed in the beauty supply trying to find a new style, color, whatever. As I wore the wigs, I cut my hair. Every few weeks, I would cut more off in order to get to where the perm was all gone. Looking at mane and chic's blog this totally could relate to relationships. Slowly but surely I was pulling away and cutting off more and more as time went by. I knew I wanted something healthier than what I had... I knew I wanted to get rid of the harsh treatment... I had my eye on the future.

Once my hair grew too much for wigs, I decided to work with some natural products. I ordered Carol's Daughter. Liked it ok, but there was something about it.

I did my hair in natural twists and wore that for quite some time. Then FINALLY... I let it all hang out. I went to my stylist and had her do a semi-BC (big chop) and color it. In hindsight I should have let her cut off any ounce of perm she saw. Hair generally acts better when it's all one thing. Either permed or natural... when you have a mix you have to be careful. So after the color and chop I pressed on.

(April 2008)

It took some getting used to, but I loved it! I did a lot of coiling. With my finger and with a comb. This is coiling. I did do twist outs and bantu knots. I think of all the natural styles the knots are my favorite. They are somewhat easy, and I love the curls I get.

(Nov 2008)

OH! Let me not forget. A friend of mine told me about titanium flat irons and hooked me up one time. **sidebar: I was told to put saran wrap on your hair to make it flowy and all nice... well my genius decided to saran wrap my hair on Friday night.. Sabbath I woke up with nicely moist frazzled hair... I was so done. Now I try new styles on Thursdays.** Ok so yes. She flat ironed it and it was PHENOMENAL. It moved better than any perm had ever moved. One little boy asked me why his mom's hair didn't move like mine. I was so excited. Until I tried to go back to my curls.

The flatness (Thanksgiving 2008)

I did a lot of knots when I realized my hair wasn't going back. Then I went back to twists for a rest and used regular Kanekalon and curled the ends. I had to let my hair grow back and let my hair rest a little. I loved that... but of course that got old after time. :) The edges would NOT go back and I was not happy. Every time I washed it my hair was coming out. Until I had chunks of colored hair coming out. In Feb 2009 I cut all my color off. (so that simulated doing a BC in April 2008) I don't plan on ever using a titanium iron again. I had it pressed with a ceramic iron and it was great and I stuck with that.

(Sept 2009)

(Dec 2009)

Then I got a super duper weave of Indian hair in January 2010. I loved it! I generally dislike weaves, but i loved this one! It was light and airy, I could wash it and I could feel my scalp. I removed that last monday (April 12 2010) *phew*

(April 2010)

Hmm to say the adjustment was easy would be dishonest. I had my hair in twists from August until December and then pressed and weaved and pressed and weaved... then a sew-in... so i hadn't seen my natural hair since last summer on the regular. First, of course I wished my hair was as long and lovely as the weave. It wasn't. It's like when you sing at the top of your lungs with headphones on thinking you soung just like Whitney Houston. Reality hit me. Stopped the tracks. I felt so ugly. I can't lie. I LOVED having my hair and scalp back, but I leaned on that hair. I got used to it. I thought about how some guys would look at me differently, or not look at all. I thought about how I'd miss feeling hair on my back. I press on.

(Last week)

Now, done a full two-strand set for the week (I hope... more than likely i'll untwist them tomorrow). My hair is kissing my shoulders so I'm happy. It's not as long as I want it to be, but it's growing and it's healthy. :) Steady pressin. I can't explain it, but there's nothing like being natural. Nothing like it.

(Today)

MCM 2010. Week One

2010-04-05T16:55:00.001-05:00

Soooo I'm super excited and nervous. I have taken the first step to running this marathon. I printed out a schedule... dude... I'm freakin nervous and I'm only running 3 miles today. like um... yeah that's not alot. smh. I'm just looking down the road like... naw I can't make it...

I was reading one site and they said that you have to get used to being on your feet for hours... HOURS... running for HOURS! what the cuss? *sigh* hours... then I thought back to my 10K... I ran for an hour... so... judging by my wack pace... it would take me over 4 hours to finish a marathon... do I care?? yes : / I freakin want to be the best. I'm intimidated... but there are three good things about this... I have a goal. I plan to reach that goal. I'll lose weight. oh gosh... oh there are bonus things too... running is so peaceful, so joyful, so awesome! :) I can't wait. So although today will only be 3 miles which is supposed to be tomorrow by my calendar, but I'm already amped to go running (my problem will be resting on the days I'm supposed to and not just running when i feel like it... but I'm DOIN IT... next week... cuz a heifa is runnin today)

LETS GO!
#Club209

April rant :) GET UP AND GET OUT!

2010-04-05T15:55:00.001-05:00

Alrighty Ighty

So it's been almost exactly a month. Here I am again. Jeez I need to blog more.

life.
Life is precious I saw that this past week. A friend of mine passed away who was an amazing man and it was crazy how quickly things can change. I mean how many of us tell someone that we'll se them next week and wonder if we'll make it there. Not that I'm saying we should be afraid, but... just live. Live your life, each day. Of course you have to work or go to school or whatever else... but take that random trip to Africa or New Orleans or Japan or even down the street to get some crazy dessert that you always wanted to try. DO IT! That's my new thing. I generally do it around my birthday, do something new every day... but seriously I want to try to do the things I desire as if... "my life depends on it" I want to reach out for the Joy that's out there because my heart needs it. When they say laughter is good for the heart it really is. I literally felt it the other day. Frowning really can't get you anywhere... crying from time to time is cleansing... but really... WHAT is the good of frowning... unless some random dude is trying to holler... but that wouldn't call for a frown... a mean mug would be just fine for that ;) or you can smile while you walk by like you didn't hear him *phew sidebar... lol* yeah so um... live your life. Be amazing NOW. Don't put things off. You have an idea to do something amazing. DO IT! :)

Now... um oooh... PJ MORTON... of course you know I love his music! And there's a new album out... GO GET IT. It comes out tomorrow, but iTunes has it out now... get it! I really can't explain why because I'd be forever. Check his page, look him up on youtube. like now... orrrr maybe in a little bit.

*sigh* oh today I'm supposed to be mowing my lawn :-/ we shall see... I REALLY don't want to AT ALL. I want to just go running. I may put it off... in that case... running >> mowing a lawn... mowing the lawn won't enhance my life or prepare me for the MCM at all.

Ooh yes this year I plan to do the Marine Corps Marathon! I can't wait! It was one thing that my friend Nathan keeeeept pushing and I really want to do it this year. I need to get on the ball in my training. :) I'm excited.

Um... speaking of that... I HATE riding in a bus... nig... 12 hours back to back? the worst. The reason for the trip helped me see the bright side... and the funny people and whatever... but Lord knows... oh my. TIRED... and you just sit there. *shrug*

Yeah... so nothing else I can think of except. I really am totally loving my real genuine friends/sisters. :) I do love them so. God has blessed.

SPEAKING OF! I'm so glad my nephew-child was born he's the cutest baby EVER! I think he's the first newborn I've held too :) yay!

I'm too lazy to give y'all pictures... so... if you're to bored to read it because I don't have pretty things on it... oh well.

lata lata

March Randomness

2010-03-03T14:10:00.002-06:00

My blog really isn't ever organized. It just is. *shrug* anywho... Life

First off it's still cold and I'm over it. I need it to be spring and stay spring. Chances of that happening is slim because the weather here is bipolar.

Gosh... *thinking* hmmm...

Facebook... oh yes. I left the other day. I thought about it for some time, and it was mentioned on Twitter... so that was all I needed. Do I miss it? Somewhat. I miss checking on my friends and what not. But we all have one another's number, so if it's that important we can communicate via phone. I don't miss the invites. I don't miss wondering if someone is going over my page and not actually saying anything to me. (Stalkers)

Working out
OOOOOOOOOOOOH yes :) That has been the most exciting thing in 2010. So far I've only missed one week of doing 4/week. I doubled up the first two days and was really busy the last two so I sucked at life. It's been awesome. I really enjoy this Nike Training Club App on the iPhone. I do HATE that it has glitches... it's rather annoying when I'm in the middle of a workout, however it gives me more time in between :) I want to turn my garage into a gym. Like really. Full out... but I know I can't. We shall see. One benefit of working out at home is that there are NO excuses. Not whatsoever. The downfall is that you have to have a little more motivation. Me personally I try to have my workout clothes laid out and I change for my workout when I get home, so no matter what I do, I'm already ready already. Healthy eating... is another story. I'm trying. No meat... well... I said trying. It's not something I'm committed to yet. I will say that yesterday when I did the thang post-workout was AWESOME. I felt like I could run a mile or so.

Anywho... I have nothing interesting to talk about right now. *shrug* so... eruh...

iShuffle

2010-02-05T12:02:00.002-06:00

When you do Quick Mix on Pandora it's pretty much a mishmash of all your stations no matter the genre. It can be weird to transition between Kim Burrell and Erykah Badu, but it happens *just happened to me*

Does it mean that the secular music that in the shuffle is so "of the world" that there is no God?
Does it have totally different agendas?
Can you listen to Kirk Franklin, Talib Kweli, Richard Smallwood and Lupe in the same sitting?

These are things I'm still thinking on... feel free to comment.

iPad blurb

2010-01-27T17:08:00.002-06:00

Ok so I gotta blog about it because everyone has so much to say about it or whatever.

The PROs:
It's a nice device. Innovative? I can't quite say because technically it's a mishmash of what Apple was already innovative in creating. I suppose the mishmashing is what makes it innovation.

iBook. I'm excited about this. I enjoy reading and it'll be cool to use. All the features in this are cool.

There aren't as many pros because the basic features that iPhone/MacBook Pro has are already something I'm a fan of.

The CONs:
disclaimer: My perception is based on wanting a MacBook Pro and considering this as a substitute like a Netbook

There is no multi-tasking. I already abhor my iPhone for this one thing. This only makes it worse. Especially because it has so many capabilities. However, in the iPad's defense, it's not a phone, so you shouldn't be concerned about responding to a text interrupting your Pandora listening experience, you just have to worry about everything else doing that. And actually there is an app for texting... so... yeah... #fail

There isn't a camera. Plain and simple.

No Flash. smh. I already hate going to miniscule websites and not having Flash... now I have a full 9.7" screen that won't allow me to do this? *sigh* #fail

The screen could be bigger. No biggie, it just could be.

Right now I can't think of anything else. I think other than those concerns its awesome! It just won't be bumped above my MacBook Pro in my priority list. 9 times out of 10 I'll have one at some point.

#twistory 101 vol.1

2010-01-21T14:25:00.003-06:00

Well alright... this is my take on #twistory101

Jeez where do we start... well hmm... first @pink82 and @trniii are super veterans. They were even on twitter before I was. I'm not sure who else was on there because I wasn't there, nor did I follow them.

@trniii loves to start stuff. Doesn't matter how late he is. Most times he's just wanting to stir stuff up. He used to talk about #boobworship, but he doesn't anymore. He's an instigator. Um... he also has been in the midst of many a tweef. He has podcasts about twitter and when we started tweeting more heavily he even started doing interview or "twinterviews" of different tweeps.

@pink82 well what can I say about her. She WAS supposed to be my TweeFF but she rejected me. We love to tweef. Most times we agree and just tweef on minor lame details. Some famous tweefs:

Saturn's being "good" cars
Plan B being so readily available
Burger King sandwich blowjob ad
Portland being "city" and Huntsville being "country"

Oh gosh I know there were more, but I can't think of any right now. lol... good times :)

Anywho she's hilarious and she also likes starting stuff and disagreeing.

Now for the hashtags... gosh... this is gonna start some stuff.

#leighjason: guy who says he's straight... but all signs point to something else...

#thesnuggler: LOL! a person who was snuggling at the wrong time completely

#boobworship: praise for all things tiggobitty

#BBG: *whoop whoop* Big Booty Girls

#CTM: cut the maddness/mess or chuck to myself... this started out as a discussion about using lol so lightly and not actually laughing out loud when you type it... so ctm was born. Some people thought it was lame so it was abused. It then became "cut the mess/maddness" and was directed towards said developers of the lameness.

#IDWNT: *lol* I don't want no trouble... generallly used when a tweef is on the horizon or could be birthed by a tweet. Made famous by Jackie Chan and @codemaker.

#WNRFHL: With no regard for human life. *LMBO!* this one is basically is a "I don't care" without regarding anyone else etc (actually close to what the eff the world FTW means)

#shoutouttomyex: self explanatory... feel free to use that at any time that you think of the lameness your ex did. Calling them out without calling them out.

Gosh... I can't think of any others that we use.

Oh and personal history?? My first name was @theperfectverse and it was too long... so it changed to @LaydiLex. Then there was a need for another account because #1 you can get locked out of twitter and when you do you're usually in the middle of something so you don't want interruption and #2 my account is private so I can't tweet people who aren't following me without it. There was a tweef about that too. :)

signed

@LaydiLex

In The River... On the Bank

2009-12-16T16:07:00.003-06:00

Man...

Sometimes you're flowin. You catch the pattern... then they sneak one in on you. If you tip-toe you may just make it.
Gotta have quick reflexes.
You'll be in that river, enjoying it... sailing along... then that bank comes in and startles you.

JumP

Cool... walking is fine...
Skip
Up and down, round and round.
Water
Life-jacket. 1. 2.. 3...

JumP

The stream becomes your net. The depth is unknown
Rock bottom becomes your bank... once again
The river's a bank with water
The bank's a dried up river
Can't keep up
Narration is fuzzy
On the bank instead of in the river
In the river instead of on the bank

...I quit
I'll just play Uno

God Does...

2009-11-18T07:38:00.003-06:00

This morning I just thought something random.

If God is cell phone service.
A particular religion/denomination is the carrier.
Within the carrier each person picks the phone that best suits them in order to have the features they need.

God... wanting God, having God is just the desire to have phone service. No matter the provider.

Can You Hear Me Now?
There are so many different carriers. Some have better voice service, some better data... (follow me...) some are decent for both. Sometimes your decision for a carrier depends on how much you are willing to pay. You may see that a carrier is better suited for your needs and seems to have better service/data, but you can't afford it. You may settle for a service based on what you can afford or based on which phone you want. If it has the features... you sign another contract and press on.

#PhoneDrama
Some are not advanced so they pick the phone that will keep them connected. They aren't concerned with frills they just need things simply done. Durable. Insured and ready to go.

Some are slightly techy so they pick the phone that has a few bells and special features. They want to connect with the carrier, have great service and be able to do more through their carrier. They want to be able to use other forms of communication like email and internet as well.

Then there are still some that are waiting for the best thing out there. They want all the special features. They want to be able to reach many through their carrier. Traveling is something they plan on doing so they need something that can go international.

There are some... some that don't really care what carrier they have... they just need a phone. Sometimes they do without a phone. *shrug* doesn't matter. Sometimes they will have the shiniest nicest appearing phone... and no service. They got the phone that didn't suit them completely but that looked good. They aren't connected.

What will you do with your service... after all... service means nothing if you aren't staying connected and reaching others...

...this was a little rough... a little random... but share your thoughts and texts...

5-day forecast.

2009-11-16T10:28:00.004-06:00

It's Monday oh joy.
It's Monday and if it wasn't for MNF I would be sad. Blah. This week is always happy though because of me having Friday off. I love my off-Friday's and this one is truly off... I have NO appointments... so far. *sigh* Although Monday's are long and boring, I'm glad to have them because they'd be far worse if I had nowhere to go to Monday morning.

UGH... ok... I must admit the fact that I can't multitask on my iPhone is more than annoying. Yes I said it. I love my phone, but that thorn is getting even more uncomfortable. I saw the Moto Cliq this weekend and it's really cute, I wish it had a bigger screen. *shrug* the apps will keep me from dying while I wait for a phone with better battery-life and multi-tasking opportunities. For now, I'll simply jailbreak it. :) Thanks @Chrismorris528. Outside of my little beefs I enjoy it.

*sigh* guess that daily 5-day forecast is useful. You never know what front may be coming through. Just because it was warm last week, doesn't mean it will be this week. Oh well. I'm prepared for whatever the Weatherman will bring. And... how does a weatherman come unprepared for the weather? #imjustsayin

Freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I don't deal with foolishness. I hope you enjoyed your time here. No syndication for you. HA! You thought i was rude before? :0) Imagine the opposite of my niceness. Got it? good. KICK ROCKS. I'll even bring you a bag full of stones if you'd like. Don't you have something better to do? Guess you'll have plenty of time to figure that out now.

This week is going to be wonderful. LET'S GO!

Just because.

2009-11-12T15:14:00.002-06:00

Today is freaking amazing. It's so gorgeous outside! I can't wait to get off and spend time with my BFF. :) yayzers.

Do the early bird!

2009-11-03T10:33:00.002-06:00

Welllllllllll I'm doing well... have a little headache trying to come one. I think that my body is fighting me gettin up early in the morning.

I was SO uber tired, but I said before I left yesterday that I was going to get to work before 7am... so I had to do it. Got up around 5:30. stumbled around the house. continued to stumble. Went into my meditation room... had devotion. It was sweet. It really is nice to have devotion while "the earth is sleep".

Since I had so much time... i made waffles. *shrug* grubbed on em. Prepared my lunch for today. Kept shuffling around the house.

Last night, in preparation i took my shower and ironed my clothes... wow that made a HUGE difference. smh. All I literally had to do was roll out of bed and throw clothes on. :)

:) Chip will be happy because we can go on a nice walk/jog or he can run in the backyard after I get off.

I love that i will get off before it gets dark. yep yep.

The only thing i hate is that I am starting to get a headache... so I must take care of that.

*sidenote: Chip is a great dog. I recently started making him go poo further out in the yard by coming up with a command of "go out" simple. He caught on very quickly and for the most part heeds to the command. I have the greatest dog ever.*

And that concludes this edition of LexiLife

Mr. Weatherman

2009-11-02T15:01:00.005-06:00

Mr. Weatherman. It's cold again. Weather is fickle. One day it's hot, others it's cold. Even today... scarf and pea coat on... and by the afternoon it's warm and I don't need either of them. *sigh* The weather can't decide what it's going to do.

Mr. Weatherman. I'm tired of the back and forth. Either it's hot or it's cold. Simple. I'm tired of unpacking and repacking clothes because I'm unsure of what the weather will do the next day... let alone the next week. The forecast isn't always right. "Can't trust the weatherman." You just have to be prepared for any type of weather. Sandals. Parka. Umbrella.

Mr. Weatherman. I need you to get it together. Some days the frost is melting. Others I can't warm up my little hands. My toes are cold. Can't move. I prepare for the cold and it warms right up. Pull out the shorts and I'm in need of a blanket. *sigh*

Mr. Weatherman. Stop lying. You don't know. I'll catch pneumonia listening to you.

Fall back

2009-11-02T14:47:00.002-06:00

*sigh*

Well I haven't blogged for real in a long time. I need to. Hmm.
Randomness....

I really enjoyed playing football for the time being. Practice was great the games were so much fun. I do believe that I need to work on my "game face" because it can be a bit mean or what not. lol.

Twitter. I love it. If you think it's lame you don't understand it and you think that it's just for reading your favorite celebs whereabouts or telling people that you're eating cereal at 5am... smh. Not so. I've met a lot of people on there and it has become a great place to just say whatever.

Sleep. Right now I'm super sleepy randomly. I don't have any idea why because time went back last night. I went to bed madd early and what not.

Chip. My boo. He is sick right now and I'm concerned. Matter of fact I'm sitting here worried a little about him because I know something was in his throat and he couldn't get it out. :( I really hope that it's not that bad. I prayed for him this morning. Lord knows I can't afford a big bill.

Life. The advertisements have been decent. I've actually seen more lately. Now it's up to Management to make decisions. I picked one out a while back but there were some disclosures that I misread. Matter of fact I just recently paid that mistake off in full. Now the funds are starting to get stacked on the side. They are accruing interest. Every day it's something new. The ups and downs. Life

Fear. I'm not scared of lions, tigers and bears... but...

~~~to be continued

Must Stop Procrastinating!!!

2009-10-27T17:22:00.003-05:00

My conference today…

I have been preparing for this meeting for months… and what not. It was the same type of meeting I attending in Pennsylvania that I led out in. This time closer to meeting time things were up in the air and all over the place so it was hectic with other projects. I was driving to work and realized I completely forgot about one major part of the conference and I was just asking God for peace. I was trying to calm down. I came in rushing to look for someone who had been on vacation for all of last week and he’s my superior… I see him in the hallway and he’s talking about us starting the conference with the very thing I forgot. PANIC! My heart dropped! And I ran to my desk to print them out. Knowing that I was going through changing them and hoping that I could kinda tweek them before the meeting… that was in about 25 minutes… which in meeting time… was RIGHT NOW! So I went back to my desk… looked at my redlined products… opened the document and NOTHING had been changed… even the basic edits weren’t done… I tried to keep calm… I saw another document because I knew I started the edits before… and voila… when I opened it… all the changes were there… I had already finished it a long time ago. There were minor things that needed to be done and I did them.

Went to print it out… forgot to use staples… printed again… the printer is stuck… so I pick another printer… stuck… and then when they printed it printed wrong… so I went to another printer. Finally… finally! And people were running late anyway so I wasn’t holding up the show (praise GOD… I hate that feeling)

Meeting started… the guy next to me redlined it right off… EVERY page! I was trippin… I was sweatin on the inside… cool as a cucumber on the outside.

Things went well. So well I was just praising God in my mind. I couldn’t hold it in. Mercy.

All I could think about was mercy because I knew that I deserved for the meeting to go terribly. I deserved to have that meeting just fall apart. I was so afraid when I was heading to my desk before the meeting I literally just wanted to walk out the door. I’m so serious. But even in my fear I kept walking, I kept pressing.

God showed out. He really did.

Next part of the meeting I knew was going to be a bit more hectic because I knew changes needed to be made for sure and I hadn’t done them on the document in the computer. (Part of the reason this meeting was so “surprising” and “out of the blue” was because I figured we were covering different topics and we didn’t do Pre-meeting strategic planning and what not… so I just knew that I wasn’t running this meeting… not so) Lucky break we had a lunch break. I rushed to my desk and cleaned up my document. Took it in there… and it was like butter. No lie. Smh. God is so amazing. Mercy.

All in all I’m so grateful for my job. And mercy… and I really need to work on my procrastination. Lol.

Morning...

2009-10-14T09:32:00.003-05:00

This morning... the first thing I did, after hitting snooze about 75 times is look at my fingers... I couldn't help but thank God for my fingers. Although I was awake, they were still sleeping. I wiggled em... I wiggled and wiggled em... and they came to life :) "Good morning fingers".

"Good morning toes"

My body has been in pain this week, but I'm thankful for pain... it means I'm living and that those areas still have feeling.

...it's the little things...

It's the little things that we have to be grateful for.
Some people don't have the opportunity to wiggle their toes.

Even though I'm feeling under the weather...

*stretch*

TYF

:)

MsCommunication: Saturn

2009-10-08T12:08:00.002-05:00

Lol... Ok... I still believe that Saturns are sucky. I probably won't ever drive one.

I realize they are "good" cars... but IMO within parameters. :) lol. IMO Saturns are good cars... if you don't want a really great car like a Honda/Toyota/Nissan. I mean why settle right? lol

I'm sooo glad that @pink82 owned one in High School and it was good for her :))) *giggle*

I also would like to thank the many Americans who kept Saturn afloat throughout the years... not sure why y'all decided to #fail them. Post-blog I'm going to start a petition to encourage all Americans to go buy a Saturn. :) They're the Best Darn American Cars Period...

#allinfun

MsCommunication: Plan B

2009-10-08T11:20:00.008-05:00

So I had a real conversation with CoWorker.

We talked about Plan B. Me and my coworker chopped it up. My pause for Plan B was packed with different thoughts. But mainly in the background it was just my heart wishing that sex wasn't so commonplace. That the kids of this up and coming generation without proper parenting and information may potentially see Plan B, Birth Control, Condoms and what not as a "way out" etc. For the most part people are going to keep having sex or not having sex regardless of what's available. Those actually are great things for those that are active because they can safeguard them from unwanted pregnancies and STDs.

I just wish people would be celibate. Unfortunately we won't be, and I understand that.

After talking with @CoWorker, he expressed how he didn't think it would measurably increase the number of people actually having sex. I understood that point. Either you are or you aren't.

RT I just wish people would be celibate. Unfortunately we won't be, and I understand that.

Obama's Speech to students

2009-09-08T16:24:00.009-05:00

Live reaction to Obama's speech (fueled by the fact that parents were pulling kids out)

First of all I would have LOVED to hear this on the first day! :)

Every one of you has something that you're good at, that you can offer. I think that's great. Some kids need to know that...

I like how he related the inventors... and he spoke of the iPhone in it. LMBO. In the same breath that he said vaccine. iPhone fanboys rejoice.

I do think that any kids that already aren't motivated and don't give a d*mn... this speech will mean nothing. For those whose minds are still being developed, who are impressionable... this will definitely motivate them.

If you quit on school you are not only quitting on yourself, you're quitting on your country. True story... although we do need someone to be the garbage man... he should have thrown that statement in there. lol. "...if you do quit, we do need garbage men, so you can pick up an application on the way out the door." I should write Obama's speeches. lol.

Nothing on the outside is an excuse for bad behavior at school. Get your act together! STFU! I love it... get ya stuff together. There are not excuses nigras! (@masterluke103).

For some students this is one of the only times they will really have someone speak to them to encourage them and really show them the success they can have. He's offering stories from different people who went through adversity.

Encouraging them to set goals. Totally great idea! Kids don't do that, and even if their parents aren't going to tell them this, now the President has.

I don't like how he spoke on the Harry Potter author... but eh.

I wish that he would have spoke to the kids that have everything handed to them. It felt like he was speaking to "urban" kids and not kids on the whole. Talk to the kids that just have things handed to them, or are doing well. Encourage those that are doing well to do better and reach back to others. I wish he would have done it in a sit down environment. Maybe slacks and an oxford. Actually sitting down. Not a dern podium speech, but that's something his handlers may have preferred. (@nathan0428)

He shouldn't have said Facebook developer... dude... that ninja dropped out of school... boy i tell ya.

I wonder what the atmosphere was like at school afterwards...

My thoughts have really changed after I saw it. That mug was so mild. Nothing was "political" like them fools were upset about. If I were to write them a letter it'd say this...

Dear parent,
I'm not sure why you pulled Sally out of school today, but I'd like to gain understanding. Is it because you were afraid of Obama influencing your kid to stay in school and do their best? Did you think he was going to talk about the war and influence your kid to join the military? Were you afraid that he was going to brainwash your child and have them brainwash you to vote for Obama for his second term?

Ok I could understand if you think that Obama is so outlandish in his views, you may have been afraid that he would take this opportunity while your kid wasn't under your supervision to hypnotise them. He's clearly that ignorant. Or even start a movement or what not. Clearly. After all, you are always supervising what they watch, listen to and do in life. You wouldn't dare let them have ANY bad influences in their lives. Don't forget to protect them from gay marriage and abortion. Pull them out of sex education too... they'll learn from the childbirthing classes after cheerleading practice next year.

Best Regards,
Alexis
OBAMA '12

Of course I'm being "extra". For those of us who were a little upset at these "dumb" parents for pulling their kids out of school, there are some things we should consider. For some of the parents it may not have even been about Obama's speech, just the fact that they could have another day of vacation after labor day. There may have been some conspiracy theorists that said that Obama was going to make them offer a pledge to Obama... (something I heard from a coworker that sound like a pile of malarky... sorry to say... why the Flip would that make sense?) They did the same thing to Bush Sr. when he did his speech back inthe day. They did more than pull kids out of school they actually had a hearing, criticizing him spending $26,000 on the broadcast. (Which actually is well worth it if you are talking about kids NOT dropping out of school.) I do see how it would be something I'd like to view with my child just so we can actually have a discussion afterwards. "so what did you think about it?" kinda convo. That would be a wonderful thing to do as a parent. In that regard, if ANY of the parents planned to approach it like that I think that's wonderful. Oh and also... by showing this in school it can stir up things in the students and teachers. In school they aren't supposed to be talking much about politics and this opens a can of worms. *thought: but THIS is not a political race... he IS the President* I know know I know... but it doesn't mean that those cans won't be opened. Kids were getting ISS after the inauguration for talking about the President, so I wouldn't put anything past parents nowadays. My 10 yr old cousin has had many debates on Obama with classmates. Some issues he is passionate about. If they show this in a classroom your kids are likely to hear the teachers political views, whether by their murmuring, demeanor or just flat out hear it. If you are for Obama, it could mean that as your child attends a classroom in the red state you live in they are bogged down with anti-Obama comments all day... just as soon as the political tensions finally were released.

It's hard to take it out of feeling like they are picking on President Obama. I just wish we all would be more objective. I think it's hard to do when some of the reasoning is fueled by him having strikes against him being a Black man AND a democrat. I mean they clearly would have preferred Palin, duh! :)

She got that gooood hair

2009-09-03T16:46:00.006-05:00

So today one of my friends asked about the reality of "good hair" and "bad hair" today. Generally society has said good hair is something that is straight, easy, generally not the natural way we (black folks) have hair come out of our scalp. Bad hair is... pretty much bad hair is everything that is related to Black hair. period.

I got curious of the definition of bad and this is what i found.

1. not good in any manner or degree.

2. having a wicked or evil character; morally reprehensible: There is no such thing as a bad boy.

3. of poor or inferior quality; defective; deficient: a bad diamond; a bad spark plug.

4. inadequate or below standard; not satisfactory for use: bad heating; Living conditions in some areas are very bad.

5. inaccurate, incorrect, or faulty: a bad guess.

6. invalid, unsound, or false: a bad insurance claim; bad judgment.

7. causing or liable to cause sickness or ill health; injurious or harmful: Too much sugar is bad for your teeth.

8. suffering from sickness, ill health, pain, or injury; sick; ill: He felt bad from eating the green apples.

9. not healthy or in good physical condition; diseased, decayed, or physically weakened: A bad heart kept him out of the army.

10. tainted, spoiled, or rotten, esp. to the point of being inedible: The meat is bad because you left it out of the refrigerator too long.

11. having a disastrous or detrimental effect, result, or tendency; unfavorable: The drought is bad for the farmers. His sloppy appearance made a bad impression.

12. causing or characterized by discomfort, inconvenience, uneasiness, or annoyance; disagreeable; unpleasant: I had a bad flight to Chicago.

13. easily provoked to anger; irascible: a bad temper.

14. cross, irritable, or surly: If I don't have my morning coffee, I'm in a bad mood all day.

15. more uncomfortable, persistent, painful, or dangerous than usual; severe: a bad attack of asthma.

17. regretful, contrite, dejected, or upset: He felt bad about having to leave the children all alone.

18. disobedient, naughty, or misbehaving: If you're bad at school, you'll go to bed without supper.

19. disreputable or dishonorable: He's getting a bad name from changing jobs so often.

20. displaying a lack of skill, talent, proficiency, or judgment: a bad painting; Bad drivers cause most of the accidents.

21. causing distress; unfortunate or unfavorable: I'm afraid I have bad news for you.

22. not suitable or appropriate; disadvantageous or dangerous: It was a bad day for fishing.

23. inclement; considered too stormy, hot, cold, etc.: We had a bad winter with a lot of snow.

24. disagreeable or offensive to the senses: a bad odor.

25. exhibiting a lack of artistic sensitivity: The room was decorated in bad taste.

26. not in keeping with a standard of behavior or conduct; coarse: bad manners.

27. (of a word, speech, or writing)

a. vulgar, obscene, or blasphemous: bad language.

b. not properly observing rules or customs of grammar, usage, spelling, etc.; incorrect: He speaks bad English.

28. unattractive, esp. because of a lack of pleasing proportions: She has a bad figure.

29. (of the complexion) marred by defects; pockmarked or pimply; blemished: bad skin.

30. not profitable or worth the price paid: The land was a bad buy.

31. Commerce. deemed uncollectible or irrecoverable and treated as a loss: a bad debt.

32. ill-spent; wasted: Don't throw good money after bad money.

33. counterfeit; not genuine: There was a bad ten-dollar bill in with the change.

34. having the character of a villain; villainous: In the movies the good guys always beat the bad guys.

35. Sports. failing to land within the in-bounds limits of a court or section of a court; missing the mark; not well aimed.

36. Slang. outstandingly excellent; first-rate: He's a bad man on drums, and the fans love him.

So I went through these and was thrown. I thought about how I grew up thinking there's good hair and bad hair and the way that my hair is was bad. According to whom? Who's to say my hair is bad? What standard is there?

Most of the definitions of bad are ridiculous. They make it just seem terrible. To call your hair, the hair that grows out of your head "bad" if that's how it naturally grows. Why should someone have to alter themselves every 2-8 weeks in order to have hair that would be categorized as good? Things like "inadequate" and "tainted" or "regretful". Mercy... have we really been using these for years? smh. Even if we don't say we have bad hair, we are always saying "she got that goood hair"... if you say someone else's is good... then there is a bad. One can't exist without the other. However on the other side of the fence, "disobedient" "causing distress", could very well describe hair in it's natural state.

I think it boils down to how YOU want your hair. If it's not what you want, it's bad, if it is, it's good. Simply put. I think it's important that we shift from just calling natural hair bad hair.

Digging further... pondering... when I had a perm I never once said I had good hair. It was what it was. It was easy, manageable and all that... but I'm not sure if I never called it good because it wasn't actually how my hair grew. There are so many ways you can look at it.

If we grew up as little girls and natural Black hair was "the standard" and accepted and cherished, would we still call it bad? If we celebrated the versatility of our follicles and explored the possibilities. Do women who grow up in predominately White communities generally find happiness in altering their hair whereas in predominately Black communities they enjoy naturals? How does media play a part?

Of course we see how they handle the light-skin/dark-skin thing... but look at hair. It's very clear that natural hair for a Black woman is NOT cherished on mainstream TV... and really not necessarily on our networks. The natural girl always has to be the one with the attitude, Black Panter-like and just so-so into her roots. Why can't the natural girl just be a woman? I think of Jill Scott on her Live album when she addresses this. In her song "Gettin in the way":

Jill: "'...Jill Scott she's supposed to be such a positive person' First off, I never said that. We have this thinking that soon as we see someone with a natural that they're automatically positive. I mean, come on... some days I am, some days I'm not. Human"

This makes me chuckle more now because I'm natural. I'm no different than I used to be. Actually I take it back... I am. I appreciate myself more. I don't know if that's due just to my hair being natural and all that comes along with it or with just growth period. I accept my forehead more now, I accept my "naps". There are times when I can't stand them... there are times when I want to slap a perm in my head... but I don't. I just love the fact that my hair is mine... it's mine.

*pondering* How can something that we go through on average, once a month... not have an effect on us. If not concisously, subconciously. As soon as we see a piece of a nap we are ready to get that liquid crack and slap it on thick. It's not good until it's essentially not really ours. What if we did that in other areas? As a hair follicle I would be offended if every time I decide to grow, I am thinking I'm doing you a favor... and you want to change me. Change...

In any state Black women change their hair. We don't wake up in the morning and just go. We do something to tame the animal unless it's in a style that doesn't require maintenance. Would we... as Black women be more accepting of ourselves and others if we were just "naked"? If we didn't alter our selves in any way and just were "ourselves" how would that change things? Or would it?

There have been times that I thought about there being a day when women just were just who they were. No fake lashes, no make-up, no weaves, no extensions, no girdles, no "good" facebook picture that doesn't really look like you look... just you... You. Beautiful YOU! How would it be? Or does that seem preposterous? And if it does... how happy are we with who we really are "naked"?

These is just thoughts... will touch on this another time...

Even how we have conditioned our men to accept our rating systems.

Ready, Set.... GO!

2009-08-26T16:41:00.007-05:00

Ok I am a runnin feen. I got knocked on my badunk a week ago with a runner that was much more skilled than me and I REFUSE for that to happen again. I was through within the first half mile. Panting for breath after only about 1.6 miles. I was deeply disappointed in myself. Well... since then I refuse for that to happen again. That was due to poor eating and terrible workout habits. Due to my schedule I fell behind and... well whatever... kick them dern excuses to the curb. IM TALKIN ABOUT HERE AND NOW. Here and now I'm on my case. I've created a checklist for my workouts. I have signed up for a 10K that is in 2 weeks (and I'm so excited btw) and I'm constantly changing my background to some inspirational running picture. I'm on it. I have to be. One thing I live for is working out... but there's something special about running. smh... it's just a feeling. It's similar to how I feel when our team is told a play and I know that the ball is trusted to be in my hands to gain yardage. The look at the field and planning routes... the only difference is... I don't depend on a quarter back to have a decent aim or defense to leave a hole or anything... I depend on my legs. My count them, one.. two.., legs. You choose where you go, you don't depend on anyone elese, it's up to you to get your lazy bones out to go running. With Chip it's great because he gets to go with me. I look forward to wearing these shoes into the ground and needing a new pair. I look forward to Nike+ and running with my friends across the nation. I look forward to so much!! the pavement awaits. :)

Anywho. I'm geeked. I wish I could go running tonight, but I have yet to find a running buddy who will run with me consistently... Freak the excuses, I'll be running before prayer meeting.

Soo... uh oooh yeah I DO have a blog. lol

2009-08-19T15:15:00.004-05:00

It's been way too long since I've blogged. Hmm what does one say? Twitter kinda does become a mini-blog. That makes me feel better about my nearly 11K tweets... which I'm sure are at 11k now... let me check.. 11060... yeah amazing. Not surprised though. I was addicted to FB.

For those that don't know what twitter is IT IS NOT WHERE YOU SIT AROUND SAYING "HI I'm sitting here picking my nose" and keep saying what you are doing. You do mention what you are doing, but you also have conversations. Generally the only time we (#thecollective) are on there continually saying what we're doing is when we don't have time to engage. Currently me @iceberg_slym and @MrDenham are talking about how lame Brett Favre is... this could go on all season... I suspect it will. You don't want to be on twitter? Stop talking about it like you know what it is. We can't help that if you tried it you followed lames, or you are a lame yourself. You WILL NOT UNDERSTAND twitter unless you're on there. #itsatwitterthang

Dear Snickers,

Every time I come to the wrapperthere's a bite out of you! Freakin A! Like seriously. I came into this store thinking that this was a brand new package. WTW? That's some malarky. I don't plan to share. I'd appreciate if you'd decide if you want to be ice cream, bite-size or king-size. I don't have time to figure this crap out. I'll wait till Halloween. And the treats are brought to MY door, without the tricks following behind you. I'll stick with my sorbet for now. It cools me down, after you've got me above room temperature.

Sincerely,
CandyGirl

*sigh* sooo... what else?

Oh so I was going to go back to school, but I refuse to pay for it in advance. We have reimbursement. Once I save up the money (due to my refusal to use a credit card for anything) I will go back. I would settle for this management degree... but I know I wouldn't apply myself because I could care less about the job I'm doing now... I want to do what God wants.

Running. I don't know where I would be without running. It truly makes me feel amazing. What's funny is that I run with people who are at a level behind me generally and this week I finally ran with someone a step ahead... well more like some miles ahead... and omg... like are you serious? My legs are still hurting and it's very necessary I run soon to get this soreness out. We were running and I was so gone... I was so mad at myself because I NEVER am that lame when it comes to running. Like I didn't even make it two miles. Perhaps it was because I didn't know the course, or not running in a few weeks, or my horrible diet that day... whatever it was it can't happen again. I was so embarassed. Not even for them, but for me. I was disappointed in myself. then we stop running... chat... and then they proceed to start running again... so we run... I thought I was going to die. like literally. I felt at one point like i was going to lose the Gladys and Ron's I ate earlier that day... But AS SOON as I finished I felt amazing! I felt so freakin amazing....

I LOVE RUNNING

So that's that. God is amazing. For those that don't understand. I tweet that... I tweet it because it's true... and whenever it's overflowing I try to tweet that. He is an amazing God.

I'm glad it's wednesday. I'm glad I'm headed to prayer meeting this evening. There are things on my heart. People that are on my heart... mercy... yes prayer meeting is so necessary.

Prop 8... everyone's talking about it.

2009-07-13T13:33:00.001-05:00

Prop 8. Simply... I'm against those things that take away the choice that God has given us. No this doesn't mean I support gay marriages. I love the people though! But yeah. that is all... Pharisaical living won't get us anywhere. We can't force anyone to abide by God's laws... that's just ignorant.

Anywho

When you get older your music should mature right? smh... not so! Ginuwine breaks the mold!!

2009-07-10T15:54:00.004-05:00

Ok... this dern CD is getting on my nerves, but I will listen to it through before I make a complete assessment.

I'm listening to Ginuwine right now and the only thing I want to do right now is pull it out of my computer and break it. Like... dude... #1 so far... nothing has a thing to do with love. All these songs are about sex, touching, looking at your body, etc... whatever you package it in the overtone is sex. Not love. WHATSOEVER. His music is so commercial it's hurting my ears. Nothing unique about it to me. Nothing classic to me about it. Perhaps I made a mistake of getting Maxwell first... *wow this CD is seriously getting on my nerves*

Ok... Maxwell on the other hand. Love, making love, serving the community, relationships. Of course you know my boy Pj Morton... he's always talking about love. Now Maxwell on the other hand is something that I look forward to listening to when I'm married. When I can partake of the fruits ;) whereas I can be down with Pj now. *I really am forcing myself to listen to this CD at this point... Ginuwine sucks to me right now... his songs haven't "matured" to real love or anything... still the same tone as Pony* I actually forgot what I was saying due to Ginuwines foolishness I want to curse right now. This song is talking about even though we aren't getting along, let's just have sex. I want to slap Ginuwine right now. Like if I had listened to this before I saw him in April I would have slapped him. Oh yeah... Maxwell... classic music. Beautiful. I do need to take a look at his lyrics to make sure I can cosign on him this album. Sometimes there are things you can't hear.

Anywho... music... boy boy boy... *wow Ginuwine is so juvenile... all them 12 year old artist and groups are singing these same songs. I need you to make music that show your age you lame!*

If it's a gift... and it's from God... who's to say when it's not serving Him?

2009-07-10T08:16:00.007-05:00

Hmm... well well well. This morning has been wonderous.

Last night went to see Pj Morton and Britten at a show in Nashville. Greatness as usual. I love live music. Anywho... got "Why can't I sing about love" a book written by Pj... This book, song, etc seemed to come right on time for me because I recently have gone back to listening to "secular" music. As a leader for the youth in the church you're somewhat required to tell them not to listen to secular music. Pretty much the concensus is that if it's not gospel it's bad... and even some gospel is bad... to me, really and truly the kids are pushed away if this is not something they understand or agree with. Hmm... I have so much to say, I can't wait to write my book... anywho... my cousins are PKs and I thought about them when I was reading his Childhood chapter. They both LOVE music, especially the youngest one who freakin adores Pj. He would die if he could meet Pj and Ed... one day he will, I'll do what I can to make sure of it I love to see sahny use his gift, and to meet artists who inspire him could take him to another level.

Golly... ok. I honestly don't have complete thoughts because I literally read the book on the way to work (I know... yes I was driving... but if I read a text or tweet... why not make it productive??) and once I got in the office because I really wanted to see what he had to say as an artist. I always always always wonder what artists are thinking. Painters, Designers, Musicians, etc... probably because my mom is around them quite a bit and she's one herself. Mainly because they are NORMAL people... like do you guys realize that they have a talent, just like we do... in a different capacity. Why do we make them into superhuman people? They breathe, eat, sleep, and probably dig in their noses... lol... anywho.

All I'm going to say is... think about why you believe what you believe. Ask yourself if it's because of a personal relationship with God or because of what you've been told. Think on why you do or don't do certain things. Sometimes when we get in a routine, we forget why we're in it... and on ocassion forget who we are. This can lead to losing a passion for serving Christ with our lives... because we don't even understand the life we're living. I don't want to spoil the book, I really want you to read it. If you can read a blog post, a tweet, a text... you can READ. Goodness gracious, reading is fundamental people. We say we don't like to read and we stay on twitter READING all day... we READ people's statii all day... we READ text messages all day... please never say "I don't like to read" ever again in life... like... just say that you don't like to read books because you are allergic to paper or something... that'd be more believable. smh. lol.

The book
Go to the site. Listen to the song. It should clean up any gray areas on what the book is about.

Stormy Weather

2009-07-08T17:33:00.002-05:00

Have you heard the story about the young lady in the storm?
She is driving with her father and a storm comes. She gets scared and sees people pulling over. Wanting to pull over she reaches for her blinker and her father tells her to keep driving. It starts raining harder and she is having a hard time seeing at a distance, large trucks are pulling over, and she feels the need to pull over again. Her father steps in and tells her to keep driving. As she keeps driving she sees a break in the clouds. She continues and eventually a sunny sky is revealed. Her father then tells her to pull over and look back. As she looks back she sees all the cars and trucks struggling and some pulled to the shoulder. This is likened to our lives and how we go through things but as we keep pressing there will be a break. Just keep swimming.

So anywho... this weekend when I was driving back from New Orleans a storm hit almost as soon as we hit the Mississippi state line. We saw the clouds coming, but we could go nowhere but forward. We had to get home. It got really bad. The one thing that's worse that driving in a storm is driving in a storm on a road that is new to you. You don't know which exits you can take to shelter yourself, you really have no idea what is going on besides what's in front of you. In some cases the best thing you can do is look at the taillights in front of you and follow. The visibility may not even allow you to see the road, the curves or what not. Hope that the car in front of you is going the same place as you are going. Otherwise you're bound to end up where they're going and not going where you need to be. Made me think...

Think about the people around you right now. As far as your close friends... do you feel you're going in the same direction enough to where if you lost your sight... if you had no direction... they'd get you on the right path. There are some of us who have friends on a different path, they may even do the ol' out the window wave to let you know that even though they are taking this exit... you need to keep pressing on. Those friends are golden. Sometimes even moreso than the ones that are on the same road trip.

Just a thought...

Yes you can have my number, no you can't call me. (lol)

2009-07-08T15:09:00.008-05:00

I must let it be known that I am a softy. Clearly too soft because I've given my number to some lame dudes lately. Not just random people. People from work and church. It can be hard to not give your number to someone you'll see every day. Sometimes I see it as an easy way out. I can give you my number and as long as I have yours I can always miss your calls... or I can not give you my number and, like this one guy is doing, have to hear about it every daggum day. *sigh* I promise you maybe my standards are just too high. Sorry I don't want to date someone I work with... just not my steelo. As far as people at church... sometimes we exchange numbers so that we all can keep involved. Nothing more. It's not cute for you to text me to try to get me to contact you back. No thanks. Don't ask me what I like in a guy because on a "tell it like it is" day I will promptly say "not you". Just because we go to church together DOES NOT mean that we have something in common. lol.

Just because I'm single does not mean I'm interested in you. Let us not forget the dude from the gym that was so pressed that he couldn't stop telling me about how he played for the Ravens and was friends with some lame celebrity, I don't even remember.

Dear gentlemen,

Be who you are. Think something of yourself. We love if you think we're great women, time for you to think you're a great man. Not cocky, just confident. After all if you don't think you're a great man, why would we? Have something you love that you do, it'll make you happy and it'll give you something to share with us that keeps us intrigued. It doesn't have to be your occupation, just something you're passionate about. Relax. You don't have to be a Bible scholar, but have some desire to serve God. Chillax. Relax relax relax. Just be cool ice cold. We could write a series of books on body language. We're generally clear on interest. Nice is one thing. Notice the difference between nice and interested. Yes hard-to-get makes that a little more confusing.. but just chill. Promise you we'll give you a sign, a smile, a wink, something. Generally if you open your mouth and tell us you're interested we can tell you whether or not we are.

...to be continued

Randomness: July

2009-07-08T10:28:00.003-05:00

It's been a minute so things are going to be all over the place.

Glad so glad that I went to New Orleans this past weekend. I am upset that I used my plastic like I did because I have been doing well. It will be paid off soon though. I'm aggressive about my plastic payoffs. Me and my mom had a fabulous time. I loved it. I am upset because I was ate up by some beach bugs and they are getting on my nerves. Been doing pretty well though.

I feel uberly so much better now that I haven't been eating late the last few days. I'm not as sleepy during the day. I suppose that may be a side effect. :) Spending more time in my room which is wonderfully fabulous during sunset because the sun comes right in. It's gorgeous (thanks God!).

Oddness. I can't even explain. You ever known someone that gives you butterflies even when you talk about them? They contact you and the blood rushes from your toes? Yet you don't have the courage to say anything to them... It's the lamest feeling in the world. Although oddly these thoughts tend to lead to me being more productive in the things I know I need to be doing. Getting my finances together and spending more QT time with God.

Dave Ramsey!! He's my boo. You have to get on his classes. Even if you think you have your finances together. I had never heard of him before and then a friend of mine put me on and I'm SO on it! I've got to take control. ^{Prov 22:7} The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender.

MJ... so I haven't said anything about it. I was saddened by his death. All the memories of what I was doing listening to his music flushed through my mind. It was surreal when I heard it at work. I just kept shaking my head. Mercy. Still even now. Of course media raped his image during the last few weeks. I've heard there were great specials for him and things, I don't have cable... so a sistah wouldn't know. The memorial was beautiful. Nothing can be perfect, even for the King of Pop and greatest entertainer that ever lived. Hopefully people can get on with life. I pray for those that put more faith in celebrities than they do in their heavenly Father. My favorite way to remember him... learning dance moves. BFF totally brought that last night. Cracked me up. :) Love my Courtni.

At the beach Chip wanted to eat everything... so he did... smh. I tried to keep him from eating the crab (shells) and the fish heads (bones) but alas he did anyway. At one point I made him come over and I attempted to get hte crab out of his mouth because I didn't know if he'd choke on it... well... being overprotective is totally biting me in the finger. lol. My finger is still a bit swollen and there is a large ... wait for it... laceration on my finger. I should have just let him eat it.

Life is beautiful. That's all. It really is. It can be as beautiful as you want it to be and as ugly as you hate it to be. I choose beauty. :)

Played out.

2009-06-12T09:05:00.003-05:00

You know how you get a new album. you love to listen to this one song... over and over and over, for months. Then... you don't... you may listen every so often, but eh... not your favorite song anymore. Kinda played out. yeah... you know that feelin? Or when you go shopping and you love to just go in the store to look at the clothes because they are so fly. You don't really want to buy anything. You try some things on and all that. Eh... not so much. bleh. Eventually merchandise is bootsi. You may window shop, but another store just opened up down the way. They have great customer service ;)

Painting the town yellow

2009-06-09T13:49:00.003-05:00

You know how you can just see differently. Like you don't get glasses or some cool magnifying glass, your eyes are just open... as if they haven't been open before. What you see is happy and flowery and stuff. I like yellow. It totally makes me smile. I'm satisfied with the play button, no need to skip chapters I want to enjoy this scene with my paint brush and my canvas. Painting the whole town yellow.

That cozy-cuddle-oozy-doozy rain

2009-06-04T13:37:00.007-05:00

I AM SO THROUGH WITH THE RAIN TODAY!

I should have stayed my tail here in my office and not gone to the stupid meeting. :( I'm pouting big freaking time! I had to run and jump through puddles. I'm so upset!! SO I use a dumb umbrella only to save my hair, which is natural so it really doesn't matter and my shoulders... my jeans got soaked. Got in my car and my car got wet inside. *siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh* had to save my leather and such. Sat there for a minute and then drove off.

To my surprise there are like 5 spots from my other building to here that are deep in water (DUMB ROADS) and you can't really avoid them. My car almost flooded about 5 times and I was through. I'm still tense.

Every time it rains like this I'm like... ooh I need to buy rain boots... and I don't. When I see them, I don't buy them because I'm feeling like I don't need them... and then it rains... and then I want them... *sigh* I want to cry. I want to take these BLASTED clothes off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did I mention my jeans are wet!? Like the whole front side just soaking. I'm glad it wasn't that "circle" rain where it hits you on all sides (wind). BUT IM NOT HAPPY. FOR YOUR INFORMATION! Not one bit. I want to be at home in my freaking BED! Enjoying a FREAKING MOVIE! UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so totally not into this FREAKING DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol.... my angry makes sad look happy. lol!

Oh and did I mention the AC is on? yeah... that is all...

I don't even want it to come another day... just later... when I'm at home... all cozy.

Stop following me!! oh... wait?? hello?

2009-06-02T14:15:00.004-05:00

So I went to one of my favorite stores Ann Taylor Loft yesterday. I was just exchanging something and browsing. Ok... cutting to the chase. The people didn't follow me around. Like it really tripped me out. I had pretty much an empty bag and I was walking around the store unnoticed. Now grant it the bags at the Loft are clear... but anyone who knows how to steal knows that doesn't make much of a difference. Anywho... yeah... they didn't follow me. It tripped me out. I was really refreshed and slightly caught off guard.

Oh... and they offered me a job, so I may take up another job for "extra" money used just for shopping :P YAY! That would be awesome right?

Back tot he topic. I think sometimes we think about our color so much that we think other people are thinking about it. Of course people just don't see a clear person, they see color... but they may not tab you to the stereotype. Simply live ya life and be yourself. Whatever people think of you will be corrected if need be.

Anywhozers. :)

Holla at G-O-D

2009-05-28T15:32:00.003-05:00

So God,

I find it funny that you continue to take care of me. When I can't seem to add 2+2... you make a way. Like I truly don't understand. It's totally like You have the greatest bank account ever in life. Dude, You're amazing. How many times have You done for me when I didn't even expect it? Hmm? ANSWER ME!? (lol) and like, You just do it... completely right on time. Man God You must be like psychic or something, or maybe You created it all and know it all. Apparently You do. That's what people keep telling me. I was going to change my status... but I change it all the time. I just have to share with someone... YOU are THE MAN! You are my everything. I want no one but You.

I feel bad sometimes because like, I don't give You all of me 100% of the time. Sometimes I don't do all that is wonderful in your site. I be wanting to give you everything... and my life moves differently. Totally stupid on my part. Why would I not want to serve You with all of my everything? Please tell me where the investment in God can fail? Oh right... I want be as popular or self-praising... Gotya. Or maybe I just want do what I please and live life and be "real". If real is serving me, I choose being unreal.

The world can kick rock... big boulders... because they clearly can't move mountains like You can.

Gee thanks God.
You are my everything.
Love You Love You Love You!!!

Yeah so ... randomness

2009-05-27T15:52:00.013-05:00

Hmm... so I think we should live our lives like it's an iPod. Should we look over life on shuffle we shouldn't have to skip any tracks.

Life is too short and so many people are thinking, doing and becoming things that in hindsight won't look so great. Life is so precious and we take it for granted... which is why we take others for granted and just do whatever in life.

I'm so sick of @trniii @masterluke103 @asdavis10 talking about boobs on twitter sorry #twitterconfidential... If they'd notice... the women aren't talking anymore. And there's no way for me to ignore a hashtag. Anywho I'm going to get twoasted once they read this... especially because I'm asking them to retweet it. lol.

I've clearly been at work and done little. Can't focus. :) not terribly bad though. I've accomplished things, just not as much as I'd like particularly. I did get to work an hour earlier than the day before and I plan to improve that.

Bleh. It's hot as HADES out there. my goodness... and it's May? WTW? What the mess and I supposed to do in July?

Note: I will not congratulate something I don't condone. Sorry. (refer to The Hills episode ) "I'm so happy for you" when I'm not? I even looked up congratulations... Here's what it means:

congratulations - expressions of pleasure or joy on another's success or good fortune, an expression of approval and commendation

So why lie? Just being real. If I don't feel it's "good fortune" why would I front? No my opinions are not the only opinion, I'm a firm believer in agreeing to disagree. I will always offer prayer because we all need it. But count on me being real about how I feel for the most part. 85% of the time. There are times when someone needs you to agree with them and baby them, I know the people and times where that's necessary. This may seem harsh, but would you prefer me to say "oooh girl I'm so happy for you congrats!! Wow... that's so great" or "ooh boy I'm so happy for you getting signed and your new album! That's so wonderful. Praise God!" and then go behind your back and say you made a stupid mistake? Now I won't tell you you made a stupid mistake to your face either because in all actually some mistakes can't be renigged. Simply because I may not condone or what not, doesn't mean I won't support an individual person. I still love them to death and that is clearly apparent because I would lie to you about how I felt if I didn't.

Please come back and close a door you walk out of. Life is not a barn. Opening another door isn't very effective. Don't depend on the draft to shut the other door. Do it properly.

Knees are killing me today... well not "killing". I just shouldn't have sprinted yesterday. A bit overzealous I was. Chip ran well though. It was even raining, which was actually nice.

Shopping is fun. Sometimes. *sigh* tiring. It also helps when you know what you're looking for. I see why there are so many designers out there. I would love to design my clothes. Clearly I don't care to spend hours shopping. Hopefully today will be the last day... most likely... it won't be.

Me likey

2009-05-20T14:12:00.002-05:00

Me likey. And that is about all I'm willing to say. Whether the bird chirps. Whether it's just a blue light flashing. Me likey.

Perfect Timing

2009-05-20T14:10:00.001-05:00

Today I got this email. It was right on time.

Psalm 16:1 Preserve me, O God: for in thee do I put my trust.

Thought for the Day: Place Your Trust Into The Hands Of The Lord

Reflection for the Day: Your Provisions Are Secure

David's life was a challenging one. His life was in constant danger yet he felt the security that God provided him. He placed his trust into the hands of the Lord knowing his provisions were provided for.

You will face numerous challenges in life, some may cause you to question the stability of your future. As you place your trust into the hands of the Lord you need not worry for God has made provisions for all of your needs.

To be completely honest there is so much going on I can't even put it to words, but I needed this email today. Lord knows. I just needed to spread the Word. smh. Keep pressing.

Get right. Eat right

2009-05-15T16:04:00.003-05:00

Been meaning to write this one all day. So when you eat right/properly and eat healthy food it makes a WORLD of difference. Been doing what I need to, to eat right for the most part. It's funny. I've pulled up to Sonic twice. Two Times... um... clearly YOU don't know how much I love Sonic. Hmmm... let me explain. I used to go to Sonic just about every time I left the gym (don't judge me.. it's deep and it's real) EVERY TIME. I've been there twice for my post-workout pig-out and I can't seem to order. Grant it the people are taking a while to answer me, but I would even pull up to the drive-thru and then just drive off because I couldn't see anything I wanted to eat.

Ended up going to Arby's last night. THEY have the BEST kid's meal ever. Have you ever been asked apple sauce or fries? wow... smh... that was a different question to answer. I wanted to say fries. Fries are what motivated me to take my butt over there. Yet I couldn't resist saying Apple sauce. I felt my body would hold me accoutable for making a bad decision. Then they asked what I wanted to drink. They have juice "boxes"... that's the COOLEST thing ever in life. They're Capri Sun's 100% juices. Anywho... yeah I got popcorn chicken. It was still overall a better meal than what I had in mind.

Anyhow feeling good feelin great. Thanks JPop for motivation! :) she'll probably never read this... lol

Friday's randomness session (vol. II)

2009-05-15T09:27:00.005-05:00

Mk... so God is UHhhhhmazing...

Anywho I would like to thank the person who came and mowed my lawn today!!! THANK YOU! Like I'm like my grandmother in that way, where if I want something done... I want it done then. It's super funny. I need to get a grasp on that, because I HATE when she does that to me. Praises be to GOD. Even though I may have to cut it from now on, it was very nice to prepare for work and know that my grass was being cut. Now I will take my raggedy self to home depot and get some weed and feed and go from there. I really appreciate YOU! Thanks... sorry for the previous blog... if you are even reading this... chances are, you aren't. lol.

So I went to workout yesterday and I mozied my way all the way there and guess what?? NO IPOD... I was so beyond heated. I almost went straight back home and waited until this morning. You have NO idea. I HATE... no no no I ABHOR working out without music. UGH! But I refused to lose. I did it. Thinking back it was so lame... ugh... anywho. I did talk to my gym-buddy much more than usual. That was cool. They were like,"What?!? Where are the headphones? You are the girl with headphones and the twist walking lunges" (lol) I stayed motivated and I made it through. Got to talk with my buddy. Although I had to listen to some stupid secular crap. One song in particular which is ALWAYS stuck in my head and I've only heard it a handful of times... upp... now I'm singing it... smh. lol.

Hm.. yeah God blessed this week. He always blesses... but just know... I'm a debt-fighting machine! Thanks to God... and it all started with me speaking life into my idea of eliminating debt.

I love my BFF Cournti so very much. Words cannot express. She is a gift from God. I love her dearly.

I'm sore... But I love it.

I got new running shoes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was so geeked. The day God gave me a little more jingle I decided to take my butt down to Fleet Feet and get good running shoes. I refused to continue to run without proper footwear and so I've really been missing running... but oh... look out world!! I'm coming at you with my Brooks! Kick pavement!

Um... Boss-employee relationship this week 4.4 stars

God is in control. Jesus take the wheel, imma just take a nap... I know you got this.

Loving my new friends. Having great GREAT conversations. Thanks God. I love you.

Hmm... yeah. lames... there are lames. lame lemon people. lamey lemony lame people. smh. and you thought you weren't lame. who are you? ha! lame

And that concludes my (first... possibly only) rant. lol

Choice words... ADSL vol. 3

2009-05-13T12:20:00.005-05:00

Ok I have to let this out or else it will eat me alive. I am so freaking tired of men who claim they want to "be a man" and do the man things. So I ask if you'll cut my grass and you jump and say yes. It's going to rain by the day that you say that you'll do it so I go ahead and do it myself... then you have something to say about it. Nothing bad, just "I said I would do it, and you jumped and did it yourself" so I say to myself... let me be a "lady".

I give you another opportunity. I say "hey dear sir, you are more than welcome to come mow my lawn... let me know when you can it needs to be cut for sure"... and low and behold you drag your FREAKING feet and it's raining... and it will be raining until Monday. I wish I could strangle you right now... because now there will be a jungle in my backyard... and you know what? I'm going to mow my own (insert word) (and another word)(insert emotion) lawn! I am so through. You can't win for losing as an independent woman. Boy I tell ya. smh. smh. smh. Y'all ni&&as make me sick right now.

...guess I needed to let that out... been told that I can't be upset. It's a favor. Not their fault that it rained. So I will be patient I suppose. I just hate to come home to a raggedy lawn... *sigh* We'll see.

Dollar Menu

2009-05-13T09:07:00.002-05:00

First you're there... I'm so geeked. Save me some money. I knew I could depend on you... then you go, without warning. No notice, just a higher price. I refuse to pay that. Now you want to come back once I've got all comfortable with the menu at Wendy's... nope. I'm straight.

Ode to my sidekick, oh kick of side

2009-04-28T09:17:00.007-05:00

If I didn't have my sidekick I would never know what time it is
If I didn't have my sidekick I wouldn't be able to get on the internet all day
Without the kick on my side I would only know about 4 phone numbers
Without the kick on my side I wouldn't be able to tweet at 1am when I should be sleep
Should my kick not be at my side I wouldn't have an alarm when I went out of town
Should my kick not be at my side I wouldn't have a calculator just waiting for me
Without my kickside I would not be able to be located
Without my kickside people wouldn't be offended if I were busy
Should the kick be to the front and not the side (lol) I wouldn't be able to speak in silence
Should the kick be to the front and not the side (lmbo) = life without creating witty acronyms
Without my slide of the side of kick I wouldn't be able to communicate with you
I wouldn't be able to take notes of the sermon when I don't have a pen and paper
I wouldn't laugh in the middle of silence and have people wonder what's so funny. :) :)
Ah side of kick... you may be booted for a curve or the Apple of my i... but you've done me well.

(lmbo!!!!!!!)

Day 2: Get Right Eat Right

2009-04-23T16:51:00.003-05:00

So today is going smoothly. I actually am tired of eating. Like... I roll my eyes... time to eat again.. :(

It's very filling. I made up for yesterday's mistakes. Tonight I will not fail!

Breakfast. Egg-white and spinach scramble. turkey sausage
Snack #1. Raw (softened in hot water) broccoli. cheese stick. turkey lunch meat
Lunch. Two medium-sized ground turkey and spinach wraps. Whole wheat wrap.
Snack #2. Banana. half a piece of bread with turkey meat. nuts and craisins.
...

Dinner to come... wraps are on the menu. Unless I fix something else. Highly unlikely.

Feelin good feeling great. TODAY IS GYM DAY!! Praises be. I'm excited and I want to leave now to go... but I can't. :(

Husbandmony

2009-04-23T09:45:00.004-05:00

Testimony...

Yesterday a woman gave a beautiful testimony of how great of a man her husband is. It was so touching. Made a lady think that God's got it... eventually I want to have that testimony. Instead of sitting there squirming during a testimony like that knowing that I don't feel that way about my own husband. Hmm... Yep... God's got it. How many people can give a husbandmony or a boyfriendmony now? Still waiting to find something to thank God for in that man? hmm... how often do we show the men we love we appreciate them? *shrug*

Why are we still pulling daisy petals?

2009-04-22T12:06:00.006-05:00

Ok so my blogger wasn't coming up fast enough... ladies stop giving yourself the title of "the one" that's God's job and He tells your man. You figure out if he's the one for you. Don't make you the one for him. Be you! That's my first rant

The main thing that brought me here is the thought about the "he loves me, he loves me not" why are we still pulling daisy petals? As women we have to stop trying to figure it out and focus on ourselves when a new potential beau comes around.

Fact: Guys like more than one female at a time. I know it's hard to believe, but a guy can think you are the jelly on his whole-wheat bread and still think another lady is peanut butter. Does that mean you are less of a catch? NO! It just means that we need to stop trying to over-incubate our eggs so that they'll hatch. Sure sometimes it works and we get some lame egg... but really... who wants a preemie omelet? One thing that a friend of mine has been coaching me to do is to like more than one guy at a time. Sounds simple right? Not so easy. I've conditioned myself to stick with the jelly. Then when the peanut butter comes around I'm already involved with the jelly and unfortunately PB & J is not always the solution. If you eat Jelly long enough you will start to love it and feel like it's the only thing for you. You really don't know. Don't have a whole squad, but ladies... have a starting line-up. Don't use them! Respect them, treat them like you would want to be treated. At the end of the season there'll be an MVP. He'll make his presence known. Let him do the work, you give him the award ;)

STAY busy. Not too busy, but live your life. Don't sit tapping your foot with open arms waiting for your next FB message, tweet or text. MOVE! Go on about your life. Get one if you don't have one. *shrug* nothing wrong with that. Just don't always be available. Now grant it, there will be those guys or times when you are available to talk... do it. If you're a tweeter/texter, be you... just be aware that if you are ALWAYS available, he'll recognize that and he can use that to his advantage should he so choose. Be balanced. Get giddy, have your long conversations/tweetersations/textersations and take a chill pill. Regroup

Don't dis your tweeps Make sure that you keep in contact with those people who have always been there for you. Don't make anyone the center of your world other than God. Make sure you keep your girls night out (or in) and your buddy time with your group of friends. Invite him along to the group activities to make sure he gets along with everyone and observe him. Go out with his peeps too.

Don't dis the dude to protect yourself smh this is so important it's stupid. Don't read so many books, watch so many episodes of Oprah and have so many girl-chats that you dis any guy. Whether you are interested in him or not. He's still a man and respect him, otherwise don't be mad when it happens to you. Be careful, but don't let your past dictate how you treat someone. You may not be a gold digger, but you will seem like and attention-starved brat. You will also seem so broken that a dude will not know what to do with you.

Never ever emasculate a man. Somehow there is something in us that disses guys. Not sure if we are over-confident or we're stuck in junior high-school flirting. This is not cool. Whatsoever. You can joke with a guy about some things that you know he'd be comfortable with... but chillax. Make sure a man knows he's a man in your eyes. No matter how strong a man is, don't play him to make him feel less of a man. What sense does that make? You may be angry, but emasculation doesn't solve a thing. It pushes a man away. hmph. He's not a dog to be trained. He's a man with feelings and an ego. Break the curse of Willie Lynch.

Get your priorities straight clean up your house. Keep your hair in order. Wear nice clothes. Keep a good attitude. Deal with your past! Recognize patterns that you have. Put them in check if you realize there's a problem. GOD FIRST... I promise you God first. Don't expect a man to have God high on his priority list if you and God are on-again-off-again.

MOST IMPORTANTLY...

Day 1: Get Right Eat Right

2009-04-22T09:41:00.003-05:00

So today I am serious about my eating. I LOVE exercise and I love eating... but I love my body more than both... and exercising more than food... sooooo therefore my eating has to get under control. Now I don't eat like EVERYTHING on this planet. I do sensible things. I generally don't have any snacks in the house so I don't walk around eating Doritos all day. Which can be a catch-22 because if I don't have snacks and I feel "snacky" I leave and go to Sonic... Sonic is of the devil. lol. jp.The solution? Healthy snacks. :)

Last night I prepared baggies with my snacks - meals 2 and 4 and this morning I prepared my breakfast and lunch - meals 1 and 3. Because it's Wednesday I will throw things off a little bit and my last snack meal will become a meal 5 and my dinner meal will become meal 4. (Wednesdays they serve food at church. I'm there from around 5-8)

So day 1 meal 1. I FEEL GREAT! Even though I didn't get to do my morning run :'( because I woke up late. I feel fabulous. Something about eating healthy does something for the mind and body. Mentally I feel good because I ate properly. Physically I don't feel heaviness for no reason. Love it. Sad I didn't run... perhaps it's best because my foot isn't healed yet.

Anywho that's my blog for now. Stay tuned. ;)

... so day one went well. The only thing that kinda threw it off is that at church they didn't have a well-balanced meal and I was late getting there. I have to stick with my meals. Anywho... that made me ultra hungry in the evening. I tried the almond/craisin mix... didn't help. Ended up eating a sandwich... *sigh* today will be better. Need to get more healthy snacks and options. Spice it up!

Chapter 10 Act Like a Lady~Think Like A Man

2009-04-14T18:36:00.007-05:00

This chapter has of course led to thinking. This book is full of tips that most women know. For me it solidified some things. Partially due to where my life is now and looking back at how asking these questions and being sincerely serious would have made a HUGE difference. Mercy!

One thing as women is that we have to first assess where we are trying to go? Are we interested in a dude because he's cute and we just want to "be" with him? Do we see long-term goals? Do we want to just go with the flow and hope that we end up on the top of things? If we really haven't thought about anything, or past next week or next month, how can we really expect a man to do that? We have to be what we expect in life. If we want a man who has goals in life and is reaching for them... do we have goals? are we reaching for them? or are we just getting by until we get that engagement ring?

If we aren't in a position to have positive outlook on relationships we aren't ready to be in one. The flags that come up are there for a reason. Sure some of them may be based off of past relationships and from pain that we never dealt with, but we need to be able to decipher the source. If there are issues in our past relationships that we haven't dealt with, we HAVE to deal with them because it is COMPLETELY unfair to bring another man into our lives with the hopes that they will somehow be better than the last one. We aren't complete because we still have a hole from what they did or did not do.

There are five questions that Steve mentions a woman needs to ask a man. These are all questions that we have heard and have asked before. One thing that makes these questions hard to ask is because we already see the white picket fences before we have gone on the second date so we end up afraid. Anywho... here are the questions and I will lend a quote from each.

these can be asked before the first date...
What are your short-term goals?
"For instance, if he says his dream is to be a producer, but he's not doing anything in the field to actually become one-- he's not interning or working for a film company... he hasn't worked for four months and has no prospects of a job in the field he says he's interested in-- then you know he has a plan. And if he doesn't have a plan he's not going to achieve his short-term goal--or he's just talking out of his behind."

What are your long-term goals?
"Trust me on this: a man who really has a vision for where he wants to see himself in ten years has looked for his future and seriously considered what it'll take for him to get there. It means he has foresight, and he's plotting out the steps to his future."

after a while...
What are your views on relationships?
"Let me be direct: if you meet a man who doesn't have a relationship with God, he doesn't go to church and has no intention of ever going, and he has no belief system e can point to as a guiding force in his life, then it's a problem. After all, what moral barometer does he answer to if not to God? What's going to make him even consider being loyal to you?"

What do you think about me?
"...every man will answer this question the same exact way: "I think you're great, I think you'd make a great mom, you're fun, kind, you're really beautiful, you turn me on, you're energetic, outgoing, a hard worker, very smart. I think you're the kind of woman I could see myself with," all of that generic stuff we know you want to hear. Still, this isn't the answer you should be looking for."

How do you feel about me?
"The I think you're cool answer isn't going to cut it here, ladies. And if, you've asked the question and probed deeper, you realize his feelings for you don't run very deep-- that's he's just not there--then you need to not be there, too. Pump the brakes until you start hearing and feeling from him the things that you think are important to hear and feel from a man with whom you are willing to forge a relationship."

Of course the book goes into depth more so with these questions. If you don't get the right answer to one of these questions and a flag arises... don't ignore it. One thing I've realized with the way this book is done is that it is not just to give you a play-by-play about dudes, but it's there also to get you to look at where you are. I recommend it completely. It's a great read. It's like having your best guy-friend write a book and you can refer to it at any time.

ALWAYS get the Performance Service Plan

2009-04-07T13:02:00.002-05:00

So God is amazing... and it's the little things.

I went to Congress this weekend and it was great!! Although I was worn out it was a great experience and I love to see young people grow spiritually. God is Amazing :)

Anywho... while at a basketball I dropped my camera, just simply dropped that mug. I turned it on to take a picture of something and low and behold my camera was broken!! Surprising I didn't fuss or anything. Simply nothing I could do. I did feel sick about it a $300 camera down the drain. So I went through the rest of the weekend taking pictures and hoping that they came out ok... which they did for the most part.

So yesterday I was looking up my Performance Service Plan and talked with a friend that works at Best Buy... the damages are covered. Like... I walked into Best Buy and told the full truth about ME dropping MY camera, and all I had to do was sign some paperwork and they are repairing and/or replacing my camera. All gravy... except Alumni is this weekend... but PRAISES... the manager says for me to just buy a camera of equal or lesser value and once everything is in order they will either repair or replace my camera and I can bring my rented camera back. ;)

So I now have a new Sony CyberShot camera and I'm pleased. Although I am upset because it's a different battery and memory card AGAIN! (and the technician let me keep my old Nikon battery... but I wasn't pleased with Nikon's performance) Anywho... new camera.

ALWAYS GET THE PSP when you get something that you wouldn't be willing to completely replace the very next day. You never know what's going to happen. That little $40 saved me $260. :)

Random thought: digital cameras and facebook have ultra potential to feed our vanity...

Tickled P!nk

2009-03-24T11:39:00.004-05:00

I'm totally tickled pink with life. Everything is wonderful. I couldn't be happier. God is amazing. Press on when you feel you just can't make it. Always speak positive things into your life. Though negative things may be around you, dwelling on them only changes your mood, not your situation. Through Christ ALL THINGS are possible, that's through Him... not you persuading Him of your edits. Hand Him your agenda and accept His edits. His way is the best way ever.

Work is going well... Friends are doing FANTABULOUS!!! Church is going well (yay Youth Congress) God is truly awesome. The small fire at my house is the devil... but lol... I spoke life into that thing. Repairs will be done in God's time. It's Him. I love Him dearly. I'm so glad. He's my #1 and He has my "him" somewhere. I have to simply become His "me". :D

Becoming God's me keeps me tickled pink. His handpicked little angels in my life are amazing. My heart is overflowing.

2009-03-24T00:08:00.002-05:00

I've come to realize that I love life. I love where God has me right now. Everything has Him in it. Everything is Him. I can't express how happy I am to have the friends I have right now. I'm learning and I'm growing. There are some things that I seem to have a hard time to understand, but I think that's why I'm having a problem... because I just need to live life, grow closer to God and let it be. UGH and I totally admire my BFF... I can't even put it to words, but I totally admire her marriage and motherhood. I bees so thankful for her. I'm truly thankful for all my friends because they're like assorted flavors, but they're just what I need. God is good. He's my all in all, the Love of my life. I trust Him. I love Him. I'm thankful because He cared enough to handpick each person that comes in my life. I'm grateful for the opportunity to know each one.

Reality TV is edu-ma-cational

2009-03-17T18:39:00.003-05:00

Okey dokes so yes I am addicted to The Hills... and more recently The City.

I just have to say something I've learned because reality TV can in fact be educational... lol

I'm a little bitter because The City is over for right now. But there are some things I've observed about Whitney that I am proud of. Here are the different scenerios (I know I'm a very sad soul):

They work for DVF (Diane von Furstenberg, huge designer) and anywho they had to pull a "look" for the girl on the cover of a big magazine. They tasked two girls to do it. Whitney pulled the look that everyone LOVED and it ended up on the cover. When she pulled it Olivia (other girl) said she didn't like it and didn't even want to pull it. Once it was revealed that Whitney's choices won Olivia took all of the credit completely. Not only that, but it was the talk of DVF to different executives. It came around to time to pick a girl to go to London and the gentleman representing London asked about the cover... Olivia again took credit and when confronted (finally) about it... she laughed it off. Anywho, this along with other Whitnissues had Whitney off her game and she blew her chance to go to London. She's realizing that she should focus on work more and do what she can to advance her career. Really this is something that I could relate to as far as focus and I am glad to see a different perspective of things. When you see things from the outside they are more clear. Whitney should have come up with a way to let it be known that she pulled the look without being caddy. Also she still should have pressed her way to impress the London gentleman no matter who he thought pulled the look. She could have impressed him, but she allowed her boy-troubles and Olivia get in her way. Never let anything get in your way.

Jay... what do I say? First of all Whitney shouldn't have been so close to this man before she moved to New York and then gotten into a relationship with him shortly after she moved out there. It associates the city with him. He picked out her apartment. He's showed her all these places, etc... She made him New York. (She was warned by Olivia... who actually has good advice, she just doesn't have any heart... she's pretty rough). This guy took advantage of Whitney's availability and began to take her for granted. Eventually they broke up after he did several careless things and he said he needed to be alone. She was hurt it took her off her game. He came back and told her that he's realized during their break that he loved her... seemed like the perfect words and all sappy and things... well she said "too little too late" that she needs to focus on her work and things. She has purposed in her heart to take a new route and I was proud of her for sticking to it even after he said some things that other women would have melted over.

Anywho... nobody I know watches this show so I blog about it... alas *sigh* I am a sad case. There are only a few shows I watch and this is one of them... sadly... lol

All da single ladies Vol. 02

2009-03-11T14:40:00.007-05:00

lol... ok so I think I may include a few little diddies about single life so this is the second entry regarding that... first one was the bugaboo one.

So some people are totally completely funny. A dude needed his hair done and I totally said I wasn't going to do it because I didn't want to be all up in his space like that. Anywho, I told him I'd let him know. He offered to give me his number so I could let him know... anyway I didn't care. Took his number.

So he texts me this afternoon to say hey and I'm keeping it ice cold. I check with a friend about him getting his hair done and ask him how much he wants to pay and all that. Anywho he goes into flirtation mode. I'm quizzin him about everything. "Oh you crush me? why?" Funny business. I played him when he said he saw me checking him out... which I was in fact doing that, but I'm not a dude... you have to do more than look good for me. (totally generalized statement... lol to those who call themselves offended) I played if off like, "nig... I watch like everyone else and to be honest your game is wack. You miss layups and you're like 7 feet tall."

Hilariosities.

Why is it that when a woman says she's single it's like she opens a candy store? lol. Just because I'm single doesn't mean I want to talk with the likes of you. I don't mind making friends, I totally enjoy laughing and getting to know people... take a dern chill pill. If your advances didn't work in the past... persistence may be a waste of your time. Generally you will get a wink or something... when you gets no signs... time to find a different route. Not a detour... but find a new road with a new destination... lol. (sorry if it sounds harsh)

2009-03-11T10:42:00.002-05:00

Dear friend,

I miss you and I am not sure what's going on. When I reach for you you all I feel is the air between my fingers. Your love for me seems to be past tense. I wish you would talk to me, I see you talk to everyone else. *sigh* If it's me, I just wish you would say something... I've lost friends before no need to be Peaches without Herb. No need to have me frontin' with a non-existent friendship.

I totally love you to death... didn't know the casualty would come so soon.

L

Dun, dun, dun duuuuuun

2009-03-10T10:01:00.002-05:00

I am definitely going to have a duel with my BFF Courtni!! We are totally going to have a sophisticated battle because she ALWAYS haphazardly tells me that prayers have been answered!!! OMGoodens! *SIGH* but I love her though. Totally had a great weekend doing her wedding things. Don't tell anyone but that was my first bachelorette party and bridal shower. So anyway... back to other news. Awwww and a song they played at the Bridal shower was sooooooo great! It's been stuck in my head since that day. I'm so very happy for her. We will still have a duel, but I will wait until after the honeymoon hmph! lol.

I'm going....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-03-04T15:55:00.005-06:00

OMG I am so excited right now!!!!!!!!!!!

I am going somewhere at the end of the month and I can't wait. I am on cloud 234850294862.1! I can't say much more because I will reveal the location. And keep ya comments to yourself... no guessing. Text me if you want to be all smart (THEO!). lol.

Randomness Vol. 001 (lol)

2009-03-03T17:06:00.004-06:00

So I've been inspired by my friend Courtni... she's so the coolest. Why we haven't found one another until now I have NO clue! Jeez! She warms my little heart and is so real and straight up about things. I LOVE IT!

Anywho... dag I forgot... (twins) ... um... thinking... I can't remember what I was going to write.

I want to apologize for those looking for my previous deep subject deep-thought blogs... just not there right now. Lots of random things happening.

One thing I hate... I can't stand when people are running late. I know, I know, I know... for those who know me I always am late (and I'm working on it), but there are some things I don't like to be late for. Anything that has a specific start time that we can't control (movies, plays, CONCERTS...) HATE TO BE LATE. Like I really hate it because I don't want to miss anything. I definitely was going to be late to see my boo PJ Morton this Sunday because of my wonderful passengers. We were supposed to leave at 4... we left at 5... I prayed hard about my attitude and the possibilities of being close. Well I guess God answered because the concert was cancelled and rescheduled to be on the weekend of Youth Congress and I will already be in the Ham so it will be perfectly ideal *muah*

Totally bummed to find out that a dude I liked was engaged. It was really really really random. We actually just went shopping and he brought it up all MoF'ly (MoF=matter of fact). Like "oh my fiance has the same car" lameness. Anywho. Whatev. Still my boi.

Played ball this weekend. It felt great. We totally sucked. 7 to like 25. I made 2pts though... so with a score like that I made 28.5% of the pts! HA... lolol. Playing ball tonight.

Ugh my hair... that will have to be another blog... *sigh*... well since we're being random. It won't do right! I cut it on Friday to cut the straight ends because I was sick of dealing with them... apparently cut more than I thought. Cut all the color off. It's so not in a style. I will rock it though. Not sure how it'll work with the whole gym and bball thing... but I am not stopping. If push comes to shove I will just touch it up or wash it and rock it curly.

I'm really really really glad that my girl Courtni found her wallet. I was so worried and I felt bad because in a way I was like... "if I hadn't of invited her..." and when she called me I had half a mind to drive all the way over to the skating rink to look in the parking lot. I even woke up and was like, "maybe I'll drive by there"... lol I even thought, "maybe I'll go at lunch". Was too thrilled when I got her super-brief message saying she found it. YAY! Oooh yay she's getting married in 12 days! :D

Saw Spamalot. Very funny. I cracked up. We were the only Black people in there I PROMISE. I love it though. Prove the stereotypes wrong. I plan to go to more plays simply to show them that Black people can be cultured... Southern states are a little behind and Alabama especially... they were shocked to see us at the play.

Madea... lol! We totally were hecka loud in there. Talking and laughing. I've NEVER done that at a movie before, but it felt good to be carefree. (lol definitely stereotypical right after I was trying to break barriers at Spamalot.. lol) I love my girlies. I really do. I'm so glad to find some great girlfriends down here... I really am. I swear I had a serotonin overdose though. My boy text me during the movie to tell me he could hear me... lols terrible. funny. *sigh*

Slumdog Millionaire... so much to say... it was a great movie. Go see it! Very well done folks.

I feel bad because I keep cancelling on watching home movies with a friend of mine... *sigh* soon...

Game night.. I want to have one soon. Yay Bible Study this weekend.

I think I like the chill-life right now. I need not a relationship, but God leads... not me. I do know that I will be spontaneous and unplanned. So in essence I am planning to be unplanned about my love life. And I think that's how God wants it. Me and my boo God have to get up anywho. All else will come around.

Some guys are interesting. You've got my sparked my friend... not sure where it goes, but I enjoy our little interractions. You always make me laugh and smile. Love the light-heartedness. Most times, if I'm not fussing at you. :)

A wonderful baby girl was born named Chloe Benet'! I was really geeked when my boy called me and told me. He had been slacking lately. Told me he was getting married and then it suddenly happened and I heard about it on FB. Glad he called me on the morning of his little darling's birth.

Woe is me alumni is coming up. This month is going to fly by. I have a lot going on. Mercy... like I won't have a break until after alumni starting this weekend. Need to be prayed up.

The forgotten face

2009-03-03T16:59:00.000-06:00

:) When you leave facebook you see who your real friends are... :)

The one's who still contact you. I know FB makes it easy. It's refreshing to be without it for a while.

Tis all...

The City

2009-03-02T16:22:00.021-06:00

Ok so like I'm totally grinning...
(1)
I thought I didn't like The City. I just watched the first episode online. One thing I don't like is her stupid uptown friends. Totally wack. Totally bourgeois. I would clearly only hang with them because I work with them. I do'nt like how Jay walked in there to take Whit from the party. I'm hoping that they cut out the time that he chilled at the party. I don't think they should have left that early...

I think it's cute how Jay swooped in though... real masculine and prince-like. Gentlemanly by bringing a hostess gift. I'm sure that he'll turn out to be a turd as the viewing continues...

..updates as I watch..
(2)
I definitely think that episode two proves why women shouldn't settle down with one person. Why do we always do that? Sure we may like a guy, but we totally need to take things slow and chill.

When a guy says that he did xyz and that he will prove it there is such a catch-22. If you say yes, you look as if you don't trust him. From the outside it seems like a guy will only say that if he has something to hide. IDK. And I definitely don't like Olivia. She is sneaky and I don't appreciate her trumping Whit's first pair of Monolo's by saying her first pair was when she was 17... real lame.

(3)
The downtown friends are more of her friends. It's important that she take things slow. Why is it such an issue? Why think hard? Why make a big deal of it?

*sigh* Whitney shouldn't be so all up in this guy as she is just now moving to New York. She's in a new city and new people. Date around, get to know the girls, know what you like.

(4)
OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG she is talking to DVF... wow. amazing. amazing. ah-mazing. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah-mazing!! And Olivia is totally jealous. LOLs.

Why do we talk a big talk when it comes to relationships and we become all gooey? jeez

COMPLETELY confused with Erin and her boy Duncan... you love him... yet you want him to stay in Toronto. Like you think it's Burger King pretty much. It doesn't really make much sense.

FEELING the new guy and how he asked her to lunch. Very bold, I love it. *dimple.dimple*

She shouldn't have brought it up to Jay about lunch. She should have just went along with the conversation. By her bringing it up and then downplaying the guy and that it's "just a guy" and all that... ok... well aw. Jay is considering dating her... very cute! I love it... i totally love it. TOTALLY love it... O... M... G...

(5)
How much are people known by the company they keep?

(6)
I like Olivia and her perspective about the dern drama. smh... stay away from it. You're a grown-face woman. Let it go. lol... she's no LC.

Conversations about other people's relationships aren't the best idea... Whit doesn't trust Jay. Jay was right on point. She took it too far.

(7)
Allie has an eating disorder...

...totally got caught by my boss.... wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy uncool...

(11)
...really not feeling Olivia acting like she pulled that fit... especially because she was against it.
Whitney is rather mature. I have to say she has a good head on her shoulders. She's not perfect.. but I see why her an LC were friends.

...I think old girl realized that something was up. I can't wait until it hits the fan. I would have played her. I would have said "I tried to tell Olivia that we should pick that look, I'm glad we did!" or something else.

The Crush

2009-02-25T11:27:00.002-06:00

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Everyone rememebers their first crush. It was like the person we crushed on was a celebrity and we were paparazzi. We couldn't wait to get a glimpse, be close to them, talk to them, etc. Dude those days were so friggin fun. Until they did something worthy to be un-crushed. Then they were lame. Alas.

It's like India.Arie's song Yellow... and imma leave it at that... :)

Toys R Us Kid

2009-02-20T14:03:00.001-06:00

I want to be a Toys R Us kid again... I miss easy life sometimes.

Why I love Chuck Taylors

2009-02-18T12:33:00.009-06:00

It has been questioned as to why a person like myself loves Chuck Taylor shoes as much as I do. This question has been a great thing for me to get back on my Blog about. I never thought about it, but let me see if I can somewhat explain.

For me Chuck Taylor's make me not take life to seriously. When I wear them I can't be all serious about life and I can maintain a fluffy & airy lifestyle. Like for instance today I have on a Lauren by Ralph Lauren Oxford, jeans and blue chucks. If I'm having a rather drab week or day, I'll put a pair on. The pair I put on either accentuate how I feel or just try to change it all around. Let's see... here are some examples. If I'm feeling all girly I'll wear my pair that has pink in them, if I'm feeling tomboyish I'll wear a blue or black pair or even my Batman pair. There are so many different kinds you can have.

As far as comparing them to other types of shoes... this is unnecessary because they are unprecedented and never will be duplicated. What other pair of shoes can you have that will go with every t-shirt you have in your closet? And possibly be made of the same material? Sure you can have some Jordan's here and some Nike's there... but what one brand/one style of shoe can you have that will go with it all? Chuck Taylors (I do realize that Nike has NikeID... still don't care, so does Converse). They're inexpensive (for the most part, even though I don't like to pay full-price for them) and they have character. No other shoe has character like these. There are so many different choices that amount of money and timing is not what separates you from the masses (like Jordan's), it's your individual style that does that.

As far as comfort... I see where you are coming from. One thing I will say is that I am not bothered by them as long as I don't wear them for a long period of time. I used to place flat insoles in them... but they take up space and are uncomfortable. For those of us that have the feet for Chuck Taylor's, they feel just fine. From a female PoV they aren't bulky like other sneakers.

They're simple. They're personal. There timeless (proven by the fact that they've been around since FOREVER! Click here) You'll save money if you stick with Mr. Taylor :)

Hmm... and since I am all enthralled by this topic I will share a few Chuck Taylor stories with you... lol

Orange pair: My first pair. I was so excited. I wanted the brightest and boldest pair that they made and back then they didn't have NEARLY as many as they have now. So I got the BRIGHT ORANGE pair. :) I still have them today. I believe these are my only pair before Nike purchased Converse.

Black pair: These I just got to go with my every days... although they are Black they still make me feel whimsy. They go with just about everything. They do need to be replaced... lol.

Pink and Orange gingham: I got these from lady footlocker. They had them during the spring and I thought they were so cute. I had a pink and multi-colored dooney and bourke... so these were a perfect fit. These make me feel all girly.

Multi-pink: These were also for my dooney... I tried to save money and get them in kids... they weren't very comfy... I gave them away :( RIP.

BATMAN : This was my favorite character growing up and still is. I had to get these. I got these in Cali. I love them... they are a bit dark, so I don't wear them much. but I love them.

Gray sweats!!: I think these are close to being one of my favorite pairs. They are made of fleece material sweats are made out of. They are SO comfortable. I love to wear them with my favorite sweats. LOVE THEM!!

There are a whole bunch more... but I think that'll do for now. My latest ones will be coming in the mail to me within a few weeks. :)

ooooooooooh and my Christmas ones!: These one's look like candy canes... they have felt on them. they feel cool and they make me feel all Christmasy... the first Christmas I had them I wore them every day before Christmas (about a week before) and on Christmas day.

So yes I have a deep affection for Chuck Taylor... and they support the Product (Red) campaign.

:)
Peaces
Lex

My New Love... My First Love...

2009-02-06T10:39:00.009-06:00

When I met you, it was hard to understand you. At first I simply passed by because you were too complex for me. I skipped along to the more familiar

I've known you for a while now. You make me smile. I feel those childhood memories come back everytime I see you. I feel at home with you. Your words make my heart race. Your feet pace and I want to be just like you. Used to want to be your first.

When I learned more about you I was intrigued. Every movement, every conversation, every time I saw you my heart raced.

I left you. Stopped seeing you. I had a new love.

The more I learned about you, the more I saw myself. You take your time with everything, you're selfless. You weren't contrived, you were real.

You started to be to change too much for me. It was hard to keep up. It was like you changed with the season and I couldn't take this roller coaster anymore.

Although I didn't see you as frequently, the time we had was memorable. Every time my heart was pacing and I couldn't keep my eyes off of you. Our time together although sparce meant so much more. Our love was long-distance

You were close to me. I saw you frequently. My time with you was special, but I knew if I didn't see you today, I'd see you tomorrow. You became nothing special to me. I took you for granted... damnit.

Now you're gone. And my weeks will tend to be long.

Now you're here. And I feel like a kid again. I can't stop gig-a-lin. You make me feel so real. I've missed you.

Goodbye NFL.

Hello NBA... again...

In Those Jeans...

2009-02-05T12:38:00.004-06:00

So many jeans are named but the whole ordeal of buying jeans is a real headache. I have to prepare my mind to go and shop for them because I ABSOLUTELY hate it. Like ok, when I find the right jeans it's magical.... other times, I want to pull my hair out.

Last night I was determined to find jeans that fit better and were more "mature" after my days of apple bottom's and skin tights. I dreaded going to the store. I made myself go. So far I'm 1-5 so those are some pretty good odds. Usually I'm 1-10 or worse. I can never get to .500 though.

Perhaps I need to spend more money on jeans and then I'll do better. I need help!!! Any other "blessed" females go through this??? Where do you get your jeans? I love to find a great new pair, but finding them is an ordeal. I need to just make a day of it.

It's not fair. All these low-rise things are just not practical. I'm not keen on showing my panties nor am I fond of crackin out. The whole extra-bootcut thing isn't working for me. And skinny jeans? lol. Can a thick girl really wear skinny jeans properly? They aren't for us. (personal opinion) I do find that Apple Bottom's account for what we need. Most of the backs of the jeans actually curve up to account for the extraness that is back there which is FANTASTIC, but I don't want Apples on my boonki. They are the ONLY jeans that fit both my waist and my boonki.

I just have to go on and on... not everyone in my size has a big waist. MoF I don't understand how someone's waist could fit into the jeans AND into the booti part. I DONT want to have to take my jeans to get altered. That's not FAIR! I wish I could boycott jeans!!! I seriously wish that there could be a type of jean I loved and it was fairly inexpensive and I could buy all the jeans they made. Not so... BabyPhat, it depends on the cut and I'm honestly tired of cats on my boonki too.

I don't want jewels, animals, or any EXTRANESS on my booti. I'll take a letter possibly and a nice design. I saw some at Anthropology the other day, but they were $150... that does not register in my mind. lol. $150, they need to do more than sit on my boonki. I see why people make jeans a lot of the time because they are the most annoying thing to shop for but ooooh when you find the right pair.

When you find the right pair of jeans it's Heaven. You want to wear them ALL the time and with everything. You wished they had two pairs, but of course they only had one. You still float on cloud nine. When you go on a date (and jeans are the attire) you pull them out with the quickness.

I don't want to get jeans altered because the threads they use aren't the same, the creases aren't as "manufactured" and it just doesn't fit right. I do remember on one episode of "Tim Gunn's Guide To Style" they took the person to a tailor who had different color threads and everything, but if I wanted to pay a zillion dollars for jeans I'd just buy the ones that fit.

I really can't stand shopping for jeans... and *sigh* I wish there were solutions.

So you pay the bills aaaaand wear pants too?

2009-02-04T09:53:00.017-06:00

One thing... why on earth was this man in my meeting yesterday continuing to use "segregation" as a term for Engineering drawings? He wanted particular drawings to be separated from others because we needed to evaluate them. Instead of saying separate, he continued to say "let's segregate these drawings". LIKE WTW (what the world)? Who says that? Does he not understand all that word holds? No person says that word. Every time I heard him say it I just cringed. At the same time, why did I cringe?

Ok I 'm sooo tired of people saying that in relationships we are EQUAL. Not so numb nuts! Gosh! !@#$%^&*^#$@$%^&*%^$#@! It's very apparent why you have power trips ladies when you think that you are supposed to be equal to a man. I am so tired of it. Don't date/marry someone that you couldn't submit yourself to. The first part of that is that you need not date/marry someone that can't submit to God. Now if you don't submit to God this rule doesn't apply to you. lol. You can't try to taket this rule and make it yours and you are still not submitting to God. I actually heard a woman say "I pay the bils" when someone said that she is supposed to submit and that her and her husband are not equal. Paaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!! Why does money control relationship rankings? I was so baffled that those words actually came out of her mouth because most women won't say that. And what made him high enough to even be equal? Did he just get there on good behavior? or the fact that he's a man? In my opinion if money is the ranking, he'd actually be below her.

As a MoF (matter-of-fact) God is where money comes from correct? So if a woman does in fact make more money than her man, could that be God trying to give her an extra dose of humility? Do the women that to make more money, need to work on their submission to God? She lives her life so high, mighty and independent that not only does she think that she's greater than her man, she in essence feels that she is invincible and dare I say bigger than God. These women could believe that they in fact control their destinies by skin of their dollars. Lol... we could have never been Jesus Christ and handled that submission. Like nig... He CREATED this whole world and all the universe and EV-A-RY-THING and He submitted Himself to our lameness. Our little tiny bodies and brains? ha! *sidenote: Why does it seem like these women NEVER lose their jobs? *

This is where independence become a THORN at a man's side. Sometimes women go overboard. Like really. Sure I have a great career and a house and my own car and we (God and I) do take care of me. This doesn't mean that I'm a man. I've checked... no testicles... nada. Like I'm still a woman and I still plan to submit. If I marry a garbage man I will submit. Now before you start rolling your eyes, hear me out. Nig, if I choose to marry him know that he has ambition and goals and whatever. It's not based solely on his current occupation. He may be a garbage man, but he's working on his Master's in XYZ and/or plans to do this or that. Now the garbage man that complains about his job every day and does nothing about it? The garbage man that has no ambitions and settles for mediocrity... not fa me. lol ok garbage man was a bit much... I may not date a garbage man... sorry... garbage?? I don't know.

Date a dude you would love your little boy to become...

...saying "you're just like your daddy" shouldn't be a threat (lol)

Date a dude who will take out the trash...

...you want a dude that will deal with your garbage.

Date a dude that can get along with your family...

...he can't be your only friend, family member and confidant.

Date a dude that has a positive outlook on life...

...rocky roads will come, he has to see over the hill.

Date a dude that will grease your scalp...

...just because :P it's the coolest thing ever!

Date your best-friend...

...he needs to love your chill mode too.

Date someone who makes you laugh...

...you'll have a blue day sometime and you'll need a LAUGH

Most importantly...
Date a dude who loves and fears God...

...why would you settle for anything less than God's best?

if you don't have a gmail account you can comment under anonymous, all I ask is that you leave your name in your comment...

They don't even ask if you want fries with that anymore...

2009-01-30T14:52:00.004-06:00

What ever happened to customer service???

Today EVERY place I went had the worst customer service.

Tax office.
Everything was pretty good. First thing, the dude doing my taxes was like 12. That's fine whatever I prefer to do it there because I know it's done right, I don't have to think about it and they got my back. I gots peeplz. So I go downstairs to sign paperwork and thangs so I can get broke off and I had questions. The lady at the front was just stank for no reason. She was hatin big time. I had some questions and she was just super stank about 'em. Personally I think she was hatin on my 401K and my monies... but whatev. So i had a final question and she just dismissed me to someone else. HEFFA! ugh. So I was going to say something smart about how they need to fix their 'tudes, but I remained Christian and upon my departure wished her a good day. (And I say to you my Liege GOOD DAY!!! lol). Onto rudeness #2

Moe's
My favorite place on earth. Whenever I'm uber happy or sad, catch me in there. They always know what to say. (daydreaming: "welcome to moes....oes... es...s..." LOLOL) Soooo I go in there about to holla at my Ruprict. The dude behind the counter was hollerin to the girl at the cash register mad rude-faced. Not friendly at all. No couth. I ended up leaving, I forgot my purse in the car and when I got back to the car I just figured I'd get ice cream and go home.

Ben & Jerry's
This heffa was sittin there head in hand leanin on the glass. The glass, I might add, that they tell US not to lean on. No gloves on the girls hands. I ask a few questions, she mumbles the answers to me. I ask for samples, she gives them. NO GLOVES. I'm like your dusty dead skin is falling in the ice cream girl! WTW? I couldn't get over her bare hands dealing with the ice cream, so I left.

Smoothie King
#1 this place is so whack, but I can't go to Jamba, so I have to settle. *tears* So I go up in there. The dudes are just so raggedy I can't even explain. They don't know who is taking the order and who's making the smoothie. Perhaps they're new. Whatev... they need training. Gah! So they take my order. As I'm standin there I look and I see that I can get another smoothie for free. Nigren, for free. These folks didn't even tell me. So I ask to get my free smoothy. These dudes are hecka confused. They ask they're alleged manager (who looked all of 20) and she is just off. He apparently said it was the "Happy Hour" special and it is in fact the "Weekend Special" soooo this girl corrects him and says that it's only from 5-9. I'm steady telling her that the weekend special says very clearly 12-5p sooooo get your life right. She goes on this long spiel about how the, "Happy hour special is from 5-9pm, those are the daily specials"... like a trained robot. Does she not understand that I DONT care what it's called I just want my free smoothie?!?! lol. I really don't care. I'm like "I never called it anything, I just wanted my free smoothie". *rolls eyes* after all this drama I get everything straight.

I think I get so frustrated because I worked retail and I prided myself on great customer service and clearly that is so dead nowadays.

Please share your woes...

PJ Morton... I {heart} him! and you should too. Spreading the love

2009-01-29T16:16:00.018-06:00

I am literally nauseous listening to the live PJ MORTON album. It doesn't make sense! Like when you hear real music again. I mean really... I miss music that has purpose.

Um I have his first album Emotions and that was great! I always crave more real music when I hear it. I now have Perfect Song and Live from L.A. !!! smh... they are the greatest. GET LIVE IN LA!!!

That mug deserves it's own paragraph. RIDICU-MOUS!!!! Like it seriously doesn't make sense. The vocals? The band? The whole... I can't even explain. BUY don't burn his music. I will come and personally fight you if you don't buy his music. He's still on the come up.

I suppose in my other blog I will discuss the other side of this idea of "good" secular music.

ToOtLe-OoTlEs.

Listen here
Buy Here

BUY don't burn!!! or I will cut you.

Yyour song

2009-01-29T12:24:00.005-06:00

When I think of Yyou I smile. Keep smiling. And smile again. Heart beats. Skips beats. Beats. Smile.

Skips again and then starts. Both making me flutter. Thoughts start rolling in. Happiness. Feeling.
Need something to accompany this condition. Something to soothe the feelings. Comfort. Warm.
When I think of Yyou I have to hear song. This song or that. Lovely music. Purposeful. Song.
New or old. This song makes me think of Yyou. Mind on Yyou. Thought. Skip beat. Beat.
These songs always are Yyou. Yyou are them. Smile. Skip beat. Embodied. Living.
I feel like Yyou're right here when I hear. Yyou are. Yyou listen. Always hearing.
Makes me continue to smile. Skip continues. Personified. Valency equals 2.
I feel you near me. Heart beat. Skipped feet. Tip tap. Movement.

Yyour song.

My song.
Song.

The Return of the Bugaboo ADSL Vol. 1

2009-01-27T22:19:00.014-06:00

Mmmmmmmmmmmk so I couldn't wait to get home and write this blog... lol

Going to the gym and being a woman about your business isn't easy nowadays. lol. I go to the gym 3 times a week and I just got back to my regular schedule. lol. So I go to the daggum gym and it's great. I know a lot of the regulars in there and everything seems normal. Besides the fact that all these resolutionaries are up in there messin up my flow. No offense to those of you just starting your workout grind. I get an attitude anytime I got in the gym and I can't get my workout down smoothly. Machines are packed, people aren't aware of gym etiquette, etc. Soooo I'm minding my own business on my elliptical machine (yes I think I own it, whatev! I do what I want. I'm polite, but when I'm working out... I'm focused) Aaaanywho oh let me back up... while I was doing my warm up lap and stretch I noticed someone I hadn't seen before downstairs, nothing big. Just stretching out. I always notice the new people because generally... those are the one's to watch out for as far as guys go. Those are the one's that want to know how serious you are about your workout, know what your name is, etc.

So now... I'm on the elliptical machine. Doin the do, watching Serena play tennis *reminds me to check on the score* and then Mr. Newby comes upstairs. I keep focused and I notice him coming by so I just glance and nod as I do most people to keep from being too rude. *rolls eyes* lol. Well, that was too much. Then he decides to come over and speak so I remove one of my earbuds and have small talk. Keeping my pace, glancing at the TV to make it apparent that I AM working out and I AM watching TV. Didn't work. Dis nucca... diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis neighbor!!! Ladies if you don't know likening a new relationship to Michelle and Barack is the new thing. LOL! He made several references to Barack and Michelle. God and all that. Talked a pretty good game. Seemed to have a good head on his shoulders, but a neighbor was pressed. lol. He even took it upon himself to show me a picture he had on the background on his phone of Michelle and Barack and say that that's what he's striving for. He asked the basic status questions, single? kids? etc... lol. diiiiiiis nucca! lolol ok. So he asked for my number. no. He asked again... no. He talked a little, said he's a good man and I'm a good woman and God wants good people together yadda yadda, then asked for the number AGAIN... no! Said something about prayer and then mentions that he prays for his wife every day. RED FLAG... nig... lol! Ha-whaaaaaat? Later on I confronted him on the wife comment like... "how do you ask and be married???" and he said something about being out of that relationship for 13 mos.

He persists... Told him that if God wants him to be with me, turning him down won't stop Him. No need to exchange numbers now or tell you my workout schedule. lol. So then there's small talk. I'm cracking up. I could have been rude, but I entertained it. He asked about taking me out... no. He offered to give his number. no. Mercy I can't even remember all the things he said. Apparently this dude is about to play Safety for the Ravens... PAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! A likely story. ROTFL! And he begged and begged and begged. Whined and whined. LOLOL. To which I just laughed. Got off the machine... *comments about... roooooooooooooooooooolls eyes, a waste of time.* I wipe the machine down and head for my warm down lap. He's following me... my nig... FOLLOWING ME. So I'm like, "Look I need to walk this lap and I don't have time, you either need to keep up or not". He keeps up. lol. Says some mess about being Jamie Foxx's BFF... LOL ... and that they're just alike. Did he think I was born yesterday?? I don't even remember what else. I do know that he talked about how he was playing basketball the other day and had folks watching all intently. Dunking and 3's and whatever. wow... lol. So then I go into the weight room, he STILL follows me, but I put on my other earbud and get to work. I don't play when it comes to my weight room!

Anyhow I went on about my business. Talked to my folks. Did my thang. Tried to duck and dodge just in case dude was out there when I left. HILARIO! Had to share because... lol... although going to the gym is a wonderful thing to do and is so exhilarating, sometimes... SOMETIMES... you want to punch someone in the face if they don't get out of your face.

lol that is my rant... my rant... I had to let it out. It made my night! lol. I may start wearing a wedding band to the gym... lol. jp :p

Here's a checklist for some newbies:
#1 WEAR headphones and on blast. If not on blast, just make sure that you know how to effectively act as if you don't hear someone.

#2 Be focused. Know what you are doing, know where things are at. If you look like you don't know where you are going, or what you are doing, there WILL be someone there to "help" you.

#3 Have some safety buddies. Some people that you know you can talk to at any point and they can rescue you. These can be personal friends or simply people you know or see all the time in the gym. (Just make sure they won't potentially become a bugaboo)

All you gymheads. Please leave your stories brief or otherwise and any tips...

All guys want a girl who works out... but sometimes you just want to work out... lol

Random rants post-inauguration

2009-01-26T12:10:00.003-06:00

Now that the high is gone. What are we going to do for our country?

We must'n't be t-shirt Obama supporters. Are all the millions about to really get out and put their booties where their mouth was? I plan to. I just need to find something new to get involved in. Through Obama's site there are different efforts so I'll check them out.

Um... so now I'm watching CNN again. YAY! I love it again!! I definitely have a different perspective now because I actually like the president. It's interesting that many of us didn't vote or care about who our Senators were and those are the very people that he's meeting with now. Boy we're bright! lol. Man in two years we need to be on our game. It's so simple, but we can't see the forrest for the trees. So guys... we need to pay attention.

Man GOP may have a Black Chair?!? That'd be awesome. Also historical, but we probably don't all know that. We're still recouping from the trip to DC.

I love the Obama's. Their outward relationship (can't speak on what it really is) is definitely something I'd like to have. She has his back and she has her own strength, not overpowering his.

Man those kids. So cute. I have a feeling their a bit spoiled though. :) J.Crew has some new "neighbors" (as my friend puts for the Nword) I've always loved J.Crew, but I will admit the fact that the Obama women shop there... makes it seem like time for a trip to da Crew.

It's everlasting... even through the storm

2009-01-26T01:56:00.005-06:00

So tonight I was listening to my girl Cece... and this part of Everlasting love was listened to multiple times. It's where I am. I love all that she says in this part of the song... The intensity in her voice and the music creates a mood. And now I shall listen again...

When the darkness filled the urgent sky
and the tears welled up in the corners of my eyes
and the sun wouldn't shine for the pourin' rain
Wondered if I'd ever see daylight again

When the stars protest at the moon's refrain
and I told myself I'd surely go insane
and the earth kept turnin' at an alarmin' pace
and I couldn't talk my heart out of joinin' the race

I remember a time (yesterday) I couldn't close my eyes
I would lie awake dispairin' don't know how many nights
Afraid to death that my chest would give way to the fear
Pulled the covers over my head and I cupped my ears

In attempt to escape the deafening sounds of silence
In attempt to escape these constant visions of violence
and with death as close as it could possibly get
heard a Voice in the distance sayin' "CeCe not yet"

Then suddenly the darkness gave away to the light
and I threw off the covers as I closed my eyes
just in time to feel your spirit grip my body like a glove
and I knew in that moment that it was your...
that it was your everlasting, lasting love

Yesterday, and today, forever more it will remain
Even now its still the same
cause my love will never change

Know that the peace that comes from above
is that same everlasting love...

Little powerful words...

2009-01-21T07:13:00.002-06:00

President Barack Obama...
First Lady Michelle Obama...

How do these words make you feel?

Inauguration Day

2009-01-20T08:47:00.001-06:00

Today the feeling cannot be described in mere words. It's electric. I may not be in DC, but I can feel it. I think no matter where you are, there is a feeling you get. This morning I couldn't decide what to wear, my heart kept racing. It can't be duplicated. I drove to the gas station and Starbucks to pick up the newspapers for today and will definitely be there bright and early tomorrow morning. I pray for the Obama families and for Black America today. I pray that this is not just a fad or a fly-by-night change we are making.

President Obama always speaks of change, but he is not doing it alone. Where are the community organizers? I'm ready to start working. I'm ready to get my hands dirty in order to clean up some things in my community. I'm ready to make a difference more than ever before. Yes because Obama has asked for it. I feel it is my duty as a newly proud American citizen to put action to the phrase "Yes WE Can"... remember we didn't say "Yes he can", so go on get out and do something!

I'm very excited to head to the movie theater to watch the events. Even if I don't make it over there, I will surely be watching it live. Bump work today, I can definitely put it off for tomorrow.

How is everyone feeling at this time?

Whether there in DC or at your respective homes, please share what is your feeling about all this?

Take the wheel...